u/chiropbby

?? is that possible? To get high on you’re own suboxone

So, I’m 3 weeks clean, stable on 4mg of suboxone a day. Florida just banned mgm, and today, idk I just feel so empty so I went and bought a single 7stax. I didn’t know if I could take it before taking my suboxone so I just took my suboxone and I plan on taking the mgm a little bit later, but I’m not gonna go into pwd if I didn’t take my sub today, and took the m and then tomorrow take my sub I wouldn’t go into pwd would I? Idk. Ik it’s just really really stupid of me but. Idk. I’m so empty inside. And this is a one time thing!! Just one last yknow time, before nowhere has it anymore. who knows maybe once my sub kicks in I won’t want it anymore idk..

I’ve been taking my 8mg sub strips like candy bc it will not pull me out of withdrawal symptoms, but it is helping dull the symptoms just not fully I still feel shitty, I’m almost 3 days off mgm been taking subs since day one but I’ve been taking so much of it I’m worried about what’ll happen when I stop? But it’s not even helping withdrawals so by the time I feel better and stop everything will I still need to taper the subs? Can I just quit them since they’re not even having an effect?

I took a quarter around 11 am bc that’s what the doc said and then after I got home from dropping my bf off I took the whole thing and then a few hours later another half and now I just got done taking a whole one and I have 8mg strips.. it’s like it’s not even doing anything.. I’m feeling okay I guess not in major major withdrawal but I still have rls and I can feel it in my arms and breasts. Like.. bro..

What would happen if I hit myself with narcan to put my self into withdrawals? Ik it sounds crazy but I’m thinking about doing this when I get some suboxone. Like I’m so tired of this shit!! I’m tired of it! I feel like it’s blocking my hrt and it makes me feel super dysphoric. Like it’s such bullshit..

I’ve tried to quit mgm about 4-5 different times, and failed everytime.. there’s a few symptoms i just can’t get over, which is the restless legs and hot flashes. Can anyone recommend something otc that actually works for restless legs/hot flashes, im thinking about to just going to this online recovery thing called WorkIt Health or something and get clonidine and gabapentin. Idk what to do.. I’m also on hrt and when I’m withdrawing my breasts hurt so much :( ugh