u/deistXfyre

dear future husband,

i don't know where you are right now. it's late, so hopefully you're getting the rest you've been really needing this week. i've been missing you, even though we haven't met yet. maybe we have, in passing, like on the train, at harold washington library, maybe you got off the bus right when i was getting on, maybe you pressed an elevator button for me because my hands were full and we exchanged smiles, i don't know.

i'm still in chicago, i feel stuck here. i probably won't move for a while, maybe ever. maybe i won't need to because you're here already.

i'm not here to play any games (unless its together on steam or something co-op in person haha), i genuinely can't wait to start building something real and sincere, even if we meet on a silly subreddit full of sneaky links and temporary satisfaction. i'm tired of the almost-relationships, the mental gymnastics, and feeling like my love isn't reciprocated. i have too much to give! i'm not seeking perfection, just something consistent and honest. say what you mean, show up when you can, and keep me updated when things are feeling down and you just need a night to yourself. i need those too.

i'm the type of girl that remembers the little things, that makes custom gifts for every birthday and christmas; i'm artsy and have too much creative energy to know what to do with. i've dabbled in many mediums, but i have a deep love for painting and sculpture. i can't wait to share my passion with my future students and with you!

when i love something or someone, i love them hard. i'm very affectionate and love making people laugh! i love team fortress 2, left 4 dead 2, my cats, my family, making gaming content and editing videos into the wee hours of the night. i love late night walks and catching the sunset at the montrose bird sanctuary and montrose harbor. i love drawing people in charcoal out in public and appreciating their beauty (always too shy to show them haha); i love people watching and spending my nights gaming and creating. i will yap your ears off about my comic and all of my art, i hope you're ready ^-^

anyways, i hope you love LOTR as much as me. i can't wait to be cuddled up on the couch with some snacks while watching the extended version, falling asleep and waking up together groggy the morning after, trying to remember where in the movie we dozed off. i hope we meet in time to catch the hunt for gollum in theatres <3

i wonder what your favorite foods are, where you like to run off to when you need alone time, what books made you cry, what games make you lose track of time and lose sleep. i wonder what silly names you've thought of naming our future child/ren. i wonder what your family is like, and what they want me to paint for them.

i wonder where you've been all my life.

i've wrote you letters before, but they're tucked away in my journals from over the years. maybe this one will find you first?

love,

step