Experiencing intense guilt, sadness, and "sub drop" after giving up full power. Why does this happen every time?
Hello everyone. I F23 have been practicing abstinence for almost a year. The other week I had a session with a guy whom I met pretty recently. He made me feel incredibly safe and genuinely cared for during our time together.
During our session I felt like I gave up full power to him completely. I did not have a single worry in the world. My mind went totally quiet and I am pretty sure that I experienced true subspace for the very first time. It was incredibly intense but it was entirely in a good way. I have never experienced a partner like that before.
He was absolutely amazing. He also provided wonderful aftercare for me. However ever since it ended I have been feeling deeply sad guilty and emotionally disconnected.
The most confusing part of this situation is that I actually feel this way after having sex every single time. Experiencing true subspace after a year of abstinence has simply made this current crash feel much heavier than usual. I am really struggling to understand my brain's reaction. I do not know why I experience such heavy sadness and guilt after a safe positive encounter where the aftercare was perfect.
Has anyone else dealt with chronic post sex blues or severe drop like this? I would really appreciate any insights on how you navigate these feelings.