u/lovesicklesbian0202

Currently hiding away in the house. My heart is pounding. I think I fucked up and bratted too far. Pray for me

We went into town today and picked up a few new things. Also side note spreader bars are annoying especially when you are used to free movement😒

Anyway we came home and played I feel like it's important to mention that my mother is staying with us for a month so she was downstairs. The first time I safeworded it was only our "I need a minute" one We'd been talking about CNC for a while and today she had me beg her to stop I think it was partly to see how we'd both feel about that kind of scene and I ended up really liking it Like a lot That's actually why I needed a minute I got stuck in my own head for a second and didn't want to stay there After a minute I was completely fine and able to get back into the moment without any anxiety. The second time I asked to completely stop because I could feel myself slipping a little too much into subspace I really didn't want to stop but I know what I'm like when I get there. I get loud and lose a bit of control and really let go I didn't want that to happen with my mother downstairs only to have to abruptly stop because of it. I didn't want to have to stop because we got too loud or this or that. Now I actually feel worse because I'm still stuck in this overwhelming submissive headspace and I wish I hadn't stopped My Dom also goes back to work tomorrow so kink is going to be on hold for a while. I was having so much fun but now I feel guilty for stopping First because I genuinely didn't want to Second because I know my Dom is going to beat herself up thinking she pushed me too hard when that definitely wasn't the case. And before anyone says it yes I am going to communicate all of this with her I know that's important I guess I just wanted to vent and ask if I was being stupid or just letting my anxiety get the better of me

We went into town today and picked up a few new things. Also side note spreader bars are annoying especially when you are used to free movement😒

Anyway we came home and played I feel like it's important to mention that my mother is staying with us for a month so she was downstairs. The first time I safeworded it was only our "I need a minute" one We'd been talking about CNC for a while and today she had me beg her to stop I think it was partly to see how we'd both feel about that kind of scene and I ended up really liking it Like a lot That's actually why I needed a minute I got stuck in my own head for a second and didn't want to stay there After a minute I was completely fine and able to get back into the moment without any anxiety. The second time I asked to completely stop because I could feel myself slipping a little too much into subspace I really didn't want to stop but I know what I'm like when I get there. I get loud and lose a bit of control and really let go I didn't want that to happen with my mother downstairs only to have to abruptly stop because of it. I didn't want to have to stop because we got too loud or this or that. Now I actually feel worse because I'm still stuck in this overwhelming submissive headspace and I wish I hadn't stopped My Dom also goes back to work tomorrow so kink is going to be on hold for a while. I was having so much fun but now I feel guilty for stopping First because I genuinely didn't want to Second because I know my Dom is going to beat herself up thinking she pushed me too hard when that definitely wasn't the case. And before anyone says it yes I am going to communicate all of this with her I know that's important I guess I just wanted to vent and ask if I was being stupid or just letting my anxiety get the better of me