u/macaronmutt

(apologies for the blurry pic, it's a screenshot from a video since i can't post the vid here <3)

the first thing i did when i got this new machine was get on my knees and fuck my throat with it, slowly turning it up and up until i got to the highest setting, getting it nice n wet to ruin my cunt with. i lovee the feeling of my throat being used, n now i can have that n show that off whenever i want!! it makes me absolutely soaked to be a brainless abuse doll like this :3

i don't know what's wrong with me. every time i look at the bruises left after an amazing session, i just crave more n more. one of my doms is super understanding & is rougher with me each time, but i just keep begging for more,,i think i need to be used by someone that doesn't love me again, that's what i really crave/need <3

i lovee putting this thing on, watching porn, smoking weed, and just drooling all over myself while my mind goes blank. using my sparkly pink wand vibrator to tease myself, making sure i'm extra needy n braindead for all the pervs on here!! sometimes i sit and i replay my trauma in my head and it hurts so much. but sometimes i sit and i thank it for making me who i am today,,being wanted n needed, even if just for sex, makes me feel so loved n adored <33

it is literally what i was born for, all i was meant for. i don't believe i have ever been loved or even liked for anything other than sex. i have been abused and used by almost every single male figure in my life. i haven't had a relationship not end poorly, i'm too emotionally unstable for real connection. i am literally just a toy, made to be used for entertainment and then dumped the moment i become inconvenient. i've finally accepted it. it's my real purpose. my dreams don't matter, all that matters is shutting my brain off and being an obedient toy.

i absolutely love being a traumawhore!! it's made me sooo addicted to filling my needy holes & showing them off on the internet. i love reading all the messages n comments i get, telling me what a dumb needy slut i am n all the naughty things they wanna do to me,,

i'm absolutely addicted to the pain of being bent over n spanked over n over again until i cry, leaving pretty bruises all over my ass,,i also got punched in my tummy and my face, thighs, tits n clit slapped!! i cried a bunch but was so good n took it all, n now i want more,, <3

I got a LOT of attention from men growing up. I was a victim of RAMCOA (Ritual Abuse, Mind Control and Organized Abuse), my stepfather, his friends, and the church he made me attend all participated, using religion to control me and other girls. Everyone tells me how awful everything I went through was, and that they can't imagine how I must feel. I'd be so humiliated if they knew how I really felt, if they knew how I want to be controlled and abused like that again, how it's all I crave...

my favorite hobby is getting super high, putting on some of my pretty pink lingerie, stuffing my mouth with my gag, and reliving all of my trauma in my head!! (or maybe even telling someone all about it) remembering how many times i've been assaulted, groped, used, n raped while i rub myself <3

i only wish i'd get taken out in public like this, with the addition of a collar and a leash,,,being led around town and seeing how many people stop to stare, take pics/vids, grope me or abuse me, and having them leave a tally or write their name with permanent marker so i remember who gave me which bruise/mark <3

i've discovered i'm a rlly desperate painslut,,i've had ppl put cigs/joints out on my tits n ass,,my ass is absolutely covered in burn scars from being a good obedient ashtray, n i just want more!! i loveee looking at the scars n marks on my soft, sensitive skin n being reminded of all the pain my superior gives to me!!