Encouragement for those still struggling
Semi lurker here. Been on this journey for quite some time (more than 20 years). Still have not gotten to where I would like to, but I keep on going. Last night I made a decision to cut off the k-tab of my Progasm Jr. I debated with this decision for a long time because you can't reverse it, but decided to do it anyways. I've cut the k-tabs off of the first gen toys (ones where the k-tab curled down) and it did help, but that was a long time ago.
I am not endorsing this, but for me it made an incredible difference. The Prograsm Jr. could dance freely. I have not experienced this level of prostate contact despite trying almost every model aneros sells. I felt the strong 'need to pee' sensation, p-waves, and I was writhing in pleasure. My whole body was squirming as if my brain could not contemplate what was happening. I was also quite vocal, and could feel the pleasure peak, drop, but then the pleasure would rise again. I could repeat this over and over, and it felt so amazing. What was different for me is that I was not questioning if the toy was hitting my prostate, it was undeniable.
I am by nature a very patient person. Maybe you are not, but know this: the pleasure is real and so are the success stories on this and the prostateplay sub. So don't give up, keep going and at some point things will start to click.
If I can share some things I've learned:
Lube is an important part. I've used a bunch of water based lubes, and X-lube is my favorite. However coconut oil is amazing. I freeze tablespoon shots of it and then use it like a suppository.
Relaxation is key. Relax your entire body. If you feel tension anywhere like your arms, neck, shoulders etc. try to relax them until you are a pile of goo. Also don't force or chase the feelings. Trust your body. Your body/brain needs to learn how to recognize the new sensations, and it will but it takes time so be patient with yourself. You will get there.
If you haven't done mindgasm, I highly recommend doing at minimum the first 3 lessons. Just knowing how to identify the different muscles is incredibly helpful.
Accept your sessions for what they are. Some will be better than others and that's ok. If a session is not going the way you would like it to, better to end it and try again at a different time.
I know nothing I've said is new, but I wanted to share that the journey is worth it. Don't give up.