Worry I’ll never find my forever girl
I feel like the things I want are too much. I want a girl to take care of that really wants me to earn her trust. I like girls who are hard to get and who think their submission is gold and something I should work to earn. I love sex but that’s not the most important part of the relationship to me.
I want a girl who really wants to be taken care of, who wants to have her clothes picked out and her hair brushed. I want to bathe her and feed her and control her body. I want to prove I’m a good leader and give her something worth following. To make sense of the world for her and make her feel safe. I’m child-free by choice and I crave a relationship where someone relies on me for so much and can come to trust me completely.
But so many times I talk to girls who just want to be physically intimate or who give up submission immediately. “Can I call you mommy?” like… less than a week in. I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable or not.
And that doesn’t begin to cover the fact that I think maybe my taste is basic? I like very feminine women and I love frills and ribbons and cute little lacy socks and bloomers and pigtails and going on picnics and having tea parties… I feel like this kind of girl is so hard to find in actuality. I don’t care what she looks like but I do like when women try hard to look nice for me. I like to spoil and treat and get rewarded with something pretty to look at and take care of.
I’m not sure if that’s a real thing I can want or just a fantasy. I wonder if I’m holding my breath for something that doesn’t exist. Idk I guess I just want to hear that there are girls who want the same thing as me. Just for some hope.