My God, how did I get here?
(Posted this in r/bisexual without much engagement) I (M41) came out as bi later in life after my wife came out to me as queer. She had in some sense known her whole life. I had no inkling through childhood and college or 90% of our marriage. It’s felt like a significant demonstration of fluidity for me. I even denied it when my interest in pegging developed 6 years ago. The thought was unappealing at that point.
I’m actually pretty sure that for me being the receptive partner in anal play wasn’t grounded in orientation; it was the exploration of pleasure and kink. And that led to my admission of curiosity around group play and me realizing that in that orgiastic setting, I’d have no qualms about engaging with someone of my gender. It would just be more fun to play with everyone and every available part!
At first I thought it purely kink-related, but more recently I realized that I have capacity to be attracted to men, still much more sexually than romantically. Are there other identity labels that I might consider? Have you come to your bisexuality through similarly sexually enthusiastic paths?