My girlfriend and I have been experimenting with chastity play for about 3 years now and got to the point where I can go up to 10 days locked in a kink3d N+ cage (downsized twice now) and when we go out with friends she has me wear the smaller N cage so it’s more hidden under my clothes.
We both really enjoy it and the benefits and fun the dynamic brings to our relationship. It’s not something that any of my or her friends know about and while that makes sense for most of our friends, it’s starting to feel heavy because no one knows. It’s also more difficult to be locked in the small N cage, and feels like the constant risk of someone finding out lands on me to manage since I’m the one wearing the cage.
I guess I’m wondering if anyone else has felt the weight of keeping it a complete secret while also being locked and teased start to feel heavy? I’m not looking to tell all our friends but the fact that 0 do is making me feel a little shame, since it’s such a guarded secret. does anyone have advice on telling someone and the best way to gauge who to tell (her friend, my friend, shared friend, etc?) We are open to telling someone just don’t know how without risking rumors or judgement or them thinking “is he locked right now?” every time they see me in person.