u/tren_de_parkinson

This happened a few months ago, but I remembered it today.

She has a tablet where she set up her Instagram account. One day she went to university and left her tablet at my house (I admit I went through her chats and stuff, which isn't exactly right). I found a chat from about a year ago with a guy where they were talking about getting together to have sex. He was asking her questions like, "Have you ever been tied up while being fucked?", "Are you going to suck me off?", "Can I slap you and cum on your face?", to which my girlfriend responded with messages like, "Yes, please cum on my face, I've never had it filled with sperm." "I'd like to be tied up while you fuck me doggy-style." "I'm going to suck you off on my knees while I look into your eyes." "If you want, you can grab my hair and use me however you want." A couple of messages later they were talking about coordinating a time for the meeting that same day, and then a message from my girlfriend saying, "I'm here, I'm outside your house." Then several hours passed until nightfall, and finally a message from my girlfriend saying, "Thank you so much, I had a great time today <3." What really turns me on and makes me incredibly hard is thinking about those hours without messages right after my girlfriend's message saying I'd arrived, probably because she was being choking by his cock, completely submissive, on her knees, looking him in the eyes while he grabbed her hair and her pussy dripping wet. Thinking about how the other guy must have made her his bitch, and then her sweetly saying goodbye with a "<3."

She doesn't know I saw this and I haven't told her about it.

I recently discovered that I'm turned on by my partner's past. But I haven't had the chance to ask her much, maybe because I don't know how.

However, this fetish started about five months ago when we were talking about her ex (whom she was with for about a year), and I asked her if she had seen him for a few months before we met. She revealed that just two months before we met, she had sex with her ex, although she's a little embarrassed about it. She was at a party and left late (around 2 a.m.), and her ex texted her, tempting her to come over to his apartment (they had already broken up). She was a little drunk, but she said she got turned on and started getting wet just thinking about it, so she went over. Once there, she revealed that as soon as she arrived, her ex took her to the underground parking garage, where my girlfriend gave him a long blowjob for a while in a corner. Then he had sex with her without a condom (she was on birth control at the time). She said it lasted about 10 minutes and then he cum loads inside her. Afterward, her ex paid for an Uber to take her home.

I won't lie, when she first told me this (I admit I asked her a lot of questions at the time and I might have been pushy, my mistake) I felt jealous and insecure, but on the other hand, I got really turned on (I didn't tell her I was aroused) knowing that before she met me, she'd been fucked and filled with sperm. It's worth noting that she had her "slutty" phase, but I haven't asked her anything explicit about what she did during that time. I only know because she told me she used to make out with guys at parties (but who knows what else she did).

So, with all that said, these past few months I've been reading about hot pasts and remembered this experience my girlfriend told me about. I've started getting turned on and touching myself every day thinking about it.

The only problem is I don't know how to bring it up with my girlfriend. She tends to be a bit closed off when talking about her past and says she's uncomfortable remembering certain things (mostly emotional stuff).