r/Husband

Am I the asshole for getting mad at my husband for leaving our 10 month old baby on a small camping chair on top of our backyard table? I came home later than usual after grocery shopping for dinner and camping meals because we are going to go off grid camping tomorrow.

As I put the burger patties on the cast iron, I looked over at my husband who is sitting outside at our backyard feeding our little kiddo. — yes, I know it’s dangerous that she’s on top of the table on a baby chair.. and yes I’ve heard of horror stories, but there is always SOMEONE who is supervising. I went outside to check on the garden hose that needed to be fix as I wait for the burgers to cook.

My husband is no where to be found. He left our 10 month old baby on the table by herself and I looked at her and I notice her chewing on something! I ran in, washed my hands ASAP and took whatever was in her mouth out. It was pea gravel! Perfect size to just get stock in her throat. I was flipping livid. I yelled for my husband and said what the f are you doing?? You left our child all alone!

Guess what he was doing.. he was tending to his cannabis plants and was more worried about them being on their side because of the wind. While he was “mending” his plants, I’m here irate. Saying he needs to get his priorities straight. I took my daughter off her chair and brought her inside. My husband yelled “I was just gone for a second! You had me rushing to mend my plants front the wind to come and get the baby that I tore a big arm off the best plant I have!!!”

He said, “you rushed me! You had me break the arm!” At this point I was so damn angry. I don’t know if I’m over reacting or what but my mom instincts know that if that rock had been lodged in her throat, I would’ve punch my husband right between the eyes to knock some scenes to him.

We are going camping tomorrow and I already know what it will be like. He will complain the whole entire time we are out there about his plant and it being my fault for it dying.

My husband and I dated for 7 years before marrying and stayed virgins till then. Both of us had high libidos which made me think he'd jump right at me the moment we are married. I know his libido was much higher because he'd have to masturbate everyday atleast once. The day we got married he didn't seem too eager to have sex, I wanted to so we tried but it was difficult. A week went by like that, me initiating every time and he'd just have a dead face while trying. I tried everything, seducing, lingerie, flirting, nothing seemed to get him hard. I started realizing he needed porn everytime he needs to get in mood, without it the air was dead between us, like he is just doing it for my sake. Months went by like that, we had fights and confrontations, I wanted the corn to stop because it felt like that was the reason.

In situations like these, women tend to blame themselves. It started feeling like I wasn't attractive or good enough. Maybe I'm doing something wrong or maybe I'm not his type? I couldn't understand.

He is a good guy, loves me a lot. Yes he has lied to me before and deleted chats with female coworkers, but that was resolved.

He is doing everything to improve our relationship now, loving me like I have never loved before, everyone around him knows.

Stuff in the bedroom is kinda improving but the porn hasn't stopped

I am curious what's going on in his head. Why wouldn't someone want to have sex for the first time. Why wouldn't it excite them, it worries me sometimes.

Any advice from a man's pov here?

Before me and my family moved into our new home 2yrs ago. My husband was the only one working. And then it was a time he was fired and I worked and he got his job back and I was still working different jobs. In that time I worked at Burlington coat factory, Amazon warehouse, Security job, Rite Aide and At a school as a lunch aide. I don’t have a problem working at all my only thing is keeping the job for more than 2months. Since we moved I worked at two jobs both nursing home jobs the first one was extremely far and I was always a few minutes late and the company didn’t like that I was there for 4months and the second job was at a nursing home as well my husband scheduled change and he said see if can get which to let time because I’m going to first shift 4:30pm-2:20am and my work schedule was 3pm-11pm and I was full time and we only had one car at that time. I talked to my job ahead of time and they wouldn’t work with me so I would just come in as soon as I could and they were upset because I was missing an hour of work. Long story short my husband put me back through school for a certified nurse assistant I need my license updated so I had to take a class again that was in November of 2025. Since then I’ve been applying to just about every nursing home in our area and cities close to us and I’ve gotten nothing I even started putting in applications for grocery stores, like Sam’s Club, Costcos, fruit markets, Krogers, cvs, Walgreens, security jobs, At home you name it I applied and still is until this day. Every time I would call for an update about my application it’s either we’ll have the hiring manager give you a call and they’ll take my name and number or it would be we’re not hiring anymore or the position has been filled. Now my husband assumed I don’t want to work and his Mother is always making comments like (She needs to get a job or it’s time to work). I’ve never had a problem working at all, now that our children are out of school I can work mornings while my husband is at home and it was a moment were I couldn’t work because I was pregnant had our second in 2020 and our third in 2021. I don’t know what else to do I keep applying to all these jobs and nothing I’m starting to lose hope my husband always tells me be patient then when his job is underway of possible shut down he tells me I need to hurry up and get a gig because they might be going on shut down soon.

Advice Request: What should I do?

im 20F and my husband is 20M and from the beginning of our relationship he was into anal play. it was uncomfortable and unfamiliar to me but i tried it once and when i fingered his butt he was clearly unfazed and open like something had been in there before but i just concluded it to him just being a straight male that likes anal play. recently i came across a post about where to find guys that’ll suck your dick (it was a post in this community) and he dropped his location. that was very first obvious sign number one. then i caught him looking up transgender porn specifically with dicks. he claims he isn’t gay but i strongly feel like he is. he also looks like a twink no lie. i feel like the answer to my question is obvious but i just want to be sure im not tripping. btw him commenting his location really hurt me because even if he is gay he didnt have to cheat on me like that..

TL;DR: Testing. husband has always been into anal play. i later found him commenting his location on a post about finding men for oral sex and found transgender porn in his search history. he says he’s straight. i’m confused and hurt and don’t know what to think.

When we were dating we used to watch nsfw content together

and masturbate to it. We sexted about people we knew and had

a pact that we wouldn't let this happen in real life, it's just a fantasy. Just before our marriage I found out he took casual pictures of a female colleague on a business trip to jerk off to it later. Even his chat with that particular colleague is deleted and he says it's because I take things wrong and there was no such thing for me to be worried. I don't think he did anything wrong but I wonder what made him delete her chat and not the chat with other female coworkers. Things changed for me since then and I stopped having any interest in that fantasy. After we got married I noticed he isn't attracted to my body or doesn't seem to get hard when I dress up or want to have sex. He would go soft very easily and sometimes during sex he would just yell to hurry up things so he doesn't go soft. After a while it started making sense that it was porn that effected him. I spoke to him about it and he tried improving things, stopped porn for a good whils. Initially it came off very fake when he tried being obsessed with my body, but things improved I guess. We were having decent sex. Recently he requested if we could start watching nsfw stuff again and I agreed because I missed that fantasy too and things seemed fine between us. Now he is jerking off to half naked girls on instagram again and I am slowly getting the ick. I just feel like he is doing it too often. I don't want him to jerk off to other women. Weirdly can tolerate porn but he only needs to watch girls sexualized, which makes me feel weird, idk if it makes sense. I am pregnant and living at my mom's place, he is coming to visit me soon so I am waiting to see if he will still be genuinely attracted to me after a

regular habit of jerking off like that.

Besides that he is a really good husband and I love him. I just want good sex, i'm dying for it. There seems to be a lack of passion between us. I asked him multiple times if it's my body, he just keeps denying no matter how hard I push him to be

honest.

Please let me know your thoughts

My husband told me to shut up just bc I said let's put the kids to sleep first then show me your Game that you wanted to show me

Then i said before you even tempt to buy that new Zelda game, pay off the debt you put us in he said oh you always ruined everything. So I kept my mouth shut. and said fine the debt u put under my name pay that off first, then buy it then he said im annoying. Who wants to be playing video games while we are in debt. like be honest I cant even buy a car or a house and u want me to freaking worry about a video game SERIOUSLY.

I watch the kids 15 hours a day 7 days a week like dont come to me for nonsense im beyond stress no break and hes honestly thinking im ruining his life when he ruined mines I cant stand him ladies how do u do it UGH....😡

He litterly wanted to call his brother to talk about this VIDEO GAME like I said we have bigger responsibilities now. LITTERLY!!!!!! hes thinks im the one thats ruining everything YUP he's an official NARCISSISTIC. IM GONNA GET A JOB AND HAVE HIM WATCH THE KIDS NOW.

And im gonna work extra shifts everyday then come back to tell him everything, he tells me and let's see who's mind will go BONKERS.

I need something spicy and different.things that we either tried or just didn’t like, feet,bdsm,another person, butt stuff. Open to anything really!