u/BricksCyclone

I'm sure everyone can relate to the "finding a dynamic partner, it goes amazing, they disappear" problem. It happened to me again.

No hard feelings against him, I know he's dealing with things in real life, but fucking damn he ruined me. He ruined me. It's been over two weeks since I've seen him online.

We talked about things I've never told to anyone and I probably never will. I trusted him with very deep and personal things, we talked for hours about anything and everything. I was genuinely considering trying the rest of the year without cumming just because he made it so fun.

And then he left.

And now I get depressed every time I try to get submissive because all I can think about is him, if he'll come back, if I'll ever get closure. I haven't been able to stay in chastity because the ache is too much and I can't submit to anyone to help the urges. I've been feeling amazing 98% of the time but in these moments I want to cry, it just fucking hurts and I miss him. I almost gave up and let myself have an orgasm last night but I held back, I was afraid I'd be disappointed in myself and I just keep imagining how excited my sir will (?) be if he comes back and I still haven't cum.

I don't know what to do anymore. I'm almost halfway to my goal but it's it even worth it if I can't enjoy it the way I used to?

You poor thing. Im in such a dominant mood today because of my pup and I just want to worship and love the obedient strong boys in this sub.

Come over here, daddy's got whatever you need. Want your holes stuffed? I'm always ready to fill them. Time for your cock or clit to be edged? Of course baby, come settle near my face. Need to spanked and told how you don't deserve to orgasm? Okay, bend over.

I want to spoil you. I want to turn your brain off. I want you to sink into the reality that you don't deserve to cum. You don't need to cum. Or maybe you just don't want to and you want to earn your pleasure. I'll support you, little one, whatever your reasoning is. Just come knocking. 💜

I've officially beat my previous denial record, I'm on day 36/101! The cramping I was worried about hasn't been an issue (my physical activity is MUCH higher than it was last time I denied this long which I'm sure is a part of it) and after edging for a few days, I decided to put myself back in chastity for a week. I won't be unlocked until the 17th!

Problem is, my Sir isn't available to help my on hard days right. He's going through his own life stuff so we've kind of put our dynamic on pause so he can focus on getting healthy and taking care of himself (I wish we weren't long distance, I want to help him) and I've been left to my own devices. All fun and good with edging, of course I wouldn't make myself cum without his permission. Hell I don't know if I'd make myself cum even WITH his permission. Luckily he loves me denied and knows what's good for me. 💜

However. I am STRUGGLING with chastity today. I locked up yesterday afternoon but my clit is already aching something fierce and despite buzzing my clit raw because I couldn't stop humping my vibrator like a selfish, out of control fuck, all I want is to roll onto my belly and do it all again. Edge the day away, edge my brain away, edge until my pussy drools and my clit is fat and tender and hungry. I know I'm better in chastity, that I'm way too greedy to touch myself without permission, because it's very common for me to give myself a hot spot on my clitoris but ignore it because the edging feels so good. Like it's a problem.

Please remind me why it's good to remain locked until given permission to touch. Why is better to wait for pleasure and not indulge and that it's so much better when you're told "no" for a while. Kind of a bad brain day but I refuse to disrupt my clit's healing just because I'm desperate.

Thank you, I hope you're all behaving!

Threw May in Chastity plans in the trash. Been going through awful shit, thought my friend/dynamic partner fucking died (all is well, he's dealing with his own hell and just didn't warn me before going dark. Made me sick with worry for days), and found myself in a weird "he's fine, you're being dramatic" and "no he's dead" grief cycle. Can you tell I have abandonment issues? I'll blame my dead brother for that one, the jerk.

Anyway. On a less heavy note I finally figured out how to hold an edge! I just wasn't using the right muscles apparently and not actually tensing said muscles correctly. It's almost like I have to tighten up so my body literally can't start contractions instead of... idk how to explain what my attempted method was before actually. But pretty cool nonetheless!

Will attempt 31 days in chastity another time when my partner is okay. This is just not the time, we rely too much on each other in no-touch stints. Looking forward to the next attempt.

I was far too busy yesterday to really have time to think about the ache between my legs but once I was home and showered and had dinner, I started to notice it. I wasn't sure if I needed to cage but I missed it, so I locked up before putting on my private collar (the handsome leather one instead of my day collar, a chain) and going to bed.

Good thing I did because I woke up constantly throughout the night with an aching desperate clit. And I mean CONSTANTLY. Every time I woke up I was thrusting into the air, bucking and opening up my legs as I imagine someone getting between them to suck the needyness out of me. Yesterday was easier too because my lovely dom was preoccupied with health stuff (he's okay! 💜), but he's actually lucid and conversational and that's just bad fucking news because even the SMALLEST, BARELY HORNY message turns me on. I'm wrapped around his finger so well it's crazy 🫠

My pussy won't stop twitching. Fuck me.

Orgasm denial day 29/101, chastity day 3/31. Holy shit I've almost been denied a month already??

Yes, 101. Not 100. My dom (who is a switch so sometimes I dom him) wanted to cum so bad yesterday after I told him I wanted to give my orgasms away to him. He hadn't cum the day before and was looking forward to releasing tonight before denying with me until May 21st to beat his previous record.

Of course I couldn't let it be that easy.

I was teasing him about not cumming, about how I was such a good boy for him and he could wait just a little longer couldn't he? He could hold out just oooone more day? It turned him on so much and gave in without much of a fight which was cute. Though since he hadn't cum since Tuesday my 101 days, he wanted my denial to be 102 but that's a slippery slope to 105 because I like doing things in 5s and 10s. We'll see what happens. I love chastity but I'm hoping after spending this entire month locked that I'll be allowed to edge more. I'm trying to learn to cum from penetration though so it wouldn't surprise me one bit if he extends me 🫠

26 days of denial. 17 days of chastity. Time to enjoy myself!

I spent the first hour or so using my fingers and then using my new Lem toy (holy shit that thing is good, I just wish the hole was a little bigger) until my clit was red and puffy and so tender I couldn't stop edging even when laying on my back, which is usually extremely hard and used to require me having a toy stuffed inside! Had to put everything away and squirm around until I calmed, then went to get new tires and go to work. I was so tender that it was almost overwhelming to touch my clit at this point.

Came home and immediately dropped on my bed and pulled out my wand and holy fuck I edged so much. Constant back to back to back edges. Most were pretty soft but I had about 4-5 hard ones where I had to clench my kegels to keep myself from ruining. I didn't even care that I'm not allowed to cum, it was just so good to actually touch my clit!

I had a pretty intense headache so I stopped with time still on the clock and put my clit away, knocked out for a solid eight hours which is out of the norm for me. Now I'm sitting here with an aching clit, a desperate desire to touch, and a deep satisfaction for my journey so far.

Shout out to my sir for helping me stay strong on my weak days and for being a gentle guiding light 💜 I'm proud that he trusts me to take care of him as well! He said he wants to buy a chastity cage when he beats his previous denial record of 20 days so I might have to pull the daddy Dom out of me to ensure he's a good boy and behaves. I want his massive dick locked away for me so he understands what I'm going through when I'm thrusting into the air and begging to touch, pussy drooling down my asshole, body hot and so very very needy.

Keep being good boys 💜

Cunt is so drooly and my clit is so fucking swollen. It feels so round compared to how it used to be before denial! I get wet so much easier now, the smallest tease will turn me on, and it's far too easy for my dom to make me squirm. This is the best life ever.

Completed my 14 days of chastity, was teased into subspace last night and slept like 9 hours. Shaved for my Sir and might shape the bush more (plus I wanted to tidy up! I prefer some stubble tho) and have spent the last hour throbbing and humping up at the sheets while my pussy drips. I haven't gotten permission to touch myself and some masochistic part of me hopes I don't get to 🫠 But like... Fuck just give me a little time to rub my clit, just enough to enjoy my new Lem toy, please for the love of GOD.

Fuck I need to be bred though. Rail my cunt into oblivion till I'm too shaky and exhausted to get up. Getting teased by a silver fox is incredibly frustratinggg, we might meet up some time. We love a pleasure dom