r/FTMorgasmdenial

Hi Sir! I was doing some thinking this morning whilst I was edging. I've realised I don't want to cum anymore. I want to sign away all my orgasms over to you. There's a few reasons I want to give up on orgasms entirely, so I will tell you them here 

Firstly, they make me selfish. When you tell me I have permission to cum I focus more on my own pleasure than yours. When we're playing I should be focusing on pleasuring you, not focusing on my greedy little cock.

Secondly, when I cum I feel less submissive. Orgasms take away that lovely, desperate, eager to please feeling I have when I'm denied. Being orgasm-free keeps me in the right headspace, keeps me wanting to do anything to please you, keeps me wanting to service you.

Thirdly, being denied teaches me self control. If I can hold off on orgasming despite craving one, then I can have self control in other matters too. 

Fourth, as selfish as it is, I love seeing the "days without orgasm" counter go up. It's a reminder of my obedience and my submission. 

Fifth, the more you allow me to orgasm, the greedier I'll get. I'll come to expect you to say yes when I ask. I don't want that. I don't want to be greedy. I don't want to only think about my own pleasure. My place as a service submissive means that I should always be thinking about how best to pleasure you. I don't want to expect you to pleasure me. I want the expectation to be that you get to decide what you'll do to me. I don't want to be upset that I didn't get what I want. I want it to be normal that I pleasure you and then I'm left frustrated and pent up.

Sixth, I'm more creative when I'm denied. The longer I go without orgasm the more ideas pop into my head. I can get ideas on how you can further tease me and torture me and make me so so wet. I can get more ideas on how to pleasure you better and how to service you. My depraved, sexually frustrated mind likes to come up with things that will make me even more depraved and frustrated. It's a loop.

The only thing that makes me worry about giving up my orgasms is that you like to watch me cum. And ultimately it is your decision if I cum or not. But I don't think orgasms are a good thing for me. They ruin my ability to serve, take me out of the headspace and generally kinda hurt a bit. They aren't good for me. I genuinely think I'd be better off without them. Then I can focus more on servicing you any way you ask.

So this is me giving up my orgasms entirely to your decision. I promise I will not ask you to cum, I will not ask you to do things a certain way so it pleasures me more, I will do everything you ask without complaint, I will focus entirely on whatevers most pleasurable for you. I am yours completely to use as you please.

I think I need a firm period without any real orgasms allowed. How long do you think I should be denied for?

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Yes I know about the puppy clip but they are not easily available and are way more expensive than I’d like. Anyone use the very flat microchastity pieces meant for cis penises? If so what works best?

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Went to relief some stress and edge myself in the work bathroom, as one does.

But I think I went a little too far? I could feel a buildup that I didnt quite manage to stop and my cunt started contracting.

Now, I've had ruins before, and they have always felt more intense than this. But they have all also always started with this unstoppable build up.

And came with a little post nut clarity lol

But this was sooooo unsatisfying 🙊

Just a few stronger clenches. But I am still horny, my clit isn't my more sensitive than before, like it is after an orgasm 🙊

Was this a true ruin? Have I ruined wrong before? A hard edge?

I don't think I will count this as a broken denial streak. But it was an interesting sensation 🙈

i haven’t cum normally since may 4th- my boyfriend has been enjoying it waaaaay too much and it’s gotten me flustered and shakey thinking about how much longer he’s gonna have me wait.

i’ve asked him to cum, but he says no because i’ve “been far too bratty lately”, and even when i’m being a good boy he tells me i can’t cum just for doing what he expects of me- but i keep asking because i keep edging and wanting some release-

but just this week- he had me rub and rub and rub but said i wouldn’t be able to cum and,,, he was right- i rubbed for a solid hour and a half and couldn’t feel anything- we’re into hypno and he mused at how easy my brain is to rewire.

i admitted to him it made me nervous- how the idea of not being able to cum- how it makes me feel a mix of fear and curiosity well up in me. how i’m afraid *he’ll* be too into it i’ll never cum again-

and he told me “you’re just worried you’ll never want to again~” and he’s,,, maybe kinda right- i can’t help but feel so worked up when he knows just how i think or *tells me* what to think.

but i want it to be his idea- aaah i want him to gaslight and manipulate me into chasity- it’s humiliating to admit i’m curious and scary to think i won’t be able to function normally again without denial ><;

but if,,,, *he* tells me it’s the rules and *makes me* wear a cage or belt then i’m not being totally embarrassing- ugh i’d much rather have him just gaslight me until i’m questioning my own thoughts than be vulnerable and admit anything directly 😖🥺

Since I’m approaching a month denied sir gave me the option to cum or stay denied and I’m unsure of what to do. On one hand I want to cum so so so badly, but on the other hand I love being a good denied slut for him. I still have a few days to mull it over but I’m just really unsure on what to do

I’m a baby trans and I have zero transmasc friends, I really want like bro friends bc I feel like that would be really gender affirming and if it was kinky, all the better. My religiously- traumatized ass really enjoys the idea of having like a “no fap” accountability buddy type relationship for this kink. Like nothing too serious

My preferred platform is discord
I don’t send pics so if that’s what you’re looking for no thank you ✌️

i can already imagine it. a house full of queer and bicurious men who just live and breathe gooning. sure, some of them have jobs, gotta pay the rent somehow, but the minute they get home they toss their clothes aside and join their bator bros on the couch. porn's playing on the tv at all times, and even then people have got their own personal stashes they scroll through on their laptops, phones and tablets. stroking their big wet goonsticks, not giving a damn how loud or perverted they are. openly enthusing about their favorite pornstars and scenes and hentai art. poppers, weed, booze, and whatever other goon-friendly drugs are all over the place. the household's favorite activity is to get together and pump their fat sticky bator cocks and edge their brains out.

and me? well, my main contribution is being the only one in the house with a wet little pussy. my gooner bros keep me topped up on poppers and edibles, they swab my useless little t-dick with lidocaine to keep me denied and horny, and then they get to use my body as a fleshlight. my favorite place to be is on the floor under one of my goonbuds as they mindlessly rut into me. he's drooling on me, but he doesn't even realize cause he's too busy staring up at the porn on the tv. he's so gooned out that i'm practically not even there. i'm not his bud, i'm just a warm tight sloppy hole to edge with.

and maybe if i'm super lucky there are some alpha men in the house keeping everybody in line. my pussy is communal property, but all the beta gooners only use my slutty holes to edge. it's a rare, delicious reward to get properly well and truly fucked, to have a stronger, older man dump his load in my pussy and stuff me with a plug to keep it all inside. i want my pussy to be constantly wet and sloppy and so well-fucked you could shove a hand inside me with barely any resistance. i wanna be so gooned out of my mind that getting my pussy stuffed like that just makes me moan and drool like a good gooner faggot. i wanna get passed around by my roommates like i'm a living sex toy and stay gooned, brainless, needy and denied for as long as humanly possible. what a dream life that'd be 🤤

Please please please tell me where and how I'm allowed to touch myself, I don't deserve to be able to decide for myself until I can prove I'm a good boy !!

I'm desperate to be commanded, ill do exactly what every comment tells me to and won't do anything without permission first, so please tell me what to do 🥺

ive never been able to hold an edge for more than a few hours. probably doesnt help that i like to spend those hours gooning, cause i always cum by accident when i do that. i want to fix that and train some self discipline.

yesterday i started watching the queue balls 21 day challenge series. four hypnosis files you're intended to listen to in stages. if i've read it right, stage 1 encourages you to edge but doesnt forbid cumming. stages 2 and onward forbid orgasms. i want to try and listen to its conclusion. ive tried no nut november before but never managed to stick it out the whole month, so im hoping 21 days will be a little less daunting.

yesterday i edged and then sat with a dildo inside me for a while before going to an appointment, but then i couldnt bear it anymore and had to cum before i went to bed. today, i listened to stage 1 again before another, longer appointment. my arousal is hard to ignore, but i've managed to avoid touching myself so far.

i mostly masturbate with a vibrator because its less painful and less annoying to clean. it also makes it a little easier to apply lidocaine cream at the tail end of my edging sessions to try and stave off orgasm when my self control starts to waver. i'm really enjoying the sensation of making my t-dick burn and get so much more responsive to my vibrator for a second, then feeling it tingle numb until i cant even feel the vibrations anymore. i'm planning to make pretty liberal use of lidocaine cream to keep my orgasms at bay.

what i'd like to try and achieve is edging for a set time limit every day, while watching those hypno videos. then numbing myself up, cleaning my toys and putting a stop to it. the files are a set length, but there's variance in the length of the videos, and the files themselves (anywhere from 20 to like 45 minutes.) i think edgemeplease might help me in that case, since i think it's got set timers with only a little variance. (massively recommend edgemeplease.com if you haven't checked it out before. the language is pretty penis-centric but it's a fun little game to play >:))

i should probably only let myself masturbate once a day under this ruleset, but there is a part of me incredibly tempted to try it twice. i should probably be looking for hypno files with awakeners at the end if i do that. if not, i'll need to find ways to make my arousal disperse after touching without cumming. i wonder if toothpaste on my dick would work? i tried that the other day and found the sting was more painful than pleasurable. be a fun little way to remind my body it's not allowed to orgasm, if it works...

my greatest concern is that i'll rile myself up by accident whenever i check in on here or on fetlife or wherever. and i write a lot of horny fanfiction in my off time, so i worry if i get too horny for too long it'll lower the quality of my writing. i'm worried about getting aroused more and more easily, because when i'm too aroused i want to touch myself, and when i touch myself i'm likely to orgasm. training myself to be disciplined enough to edge without coming is one thing, it's another to train myself out of touching myself when i'm horny.

i know this is long but i'm kinda just working stuff out by typing it. its like rubber duck programming lol. any advice is welcome but not strictly necessary. i guess wish me luck :}