u/KaijuTree123

Every guy on the apps lie to me. (Hinge, bumble) I'm talking about things like where a guy says oh I'm not like most guys, I would never ghost or do this or that, I'd let you know if I'm interested or not, but continues to be like most guys. A few recent examples, I had been talking to a guy whose thin (my type), he said bigger guys is what he likes. I then see his now dating a guy thinner than him. Mind you I have heard this before & they always end up with a thin guy. (I'm very blunt and upfront with what I like and dislike, I don't want my time wasted). Another guy said he was a switch sub/dom wise and okay with my kinks. We spoke for a week consistently about everything else & were planning to meet. He waits until last night to tell me his not into doing kinks and is only sub. We had talked so much about how we despise the things I'd mentioned above & how different this is, and then decides to pull this crap. I guess selective hearing, I'll pretend I never saw/heard things, is how modern dating is these days 🙄.

--- I see 50% down vote for telling the truth. Crazy.

So I'm 33. Tall, beefy hairy guy. I go on dates with guys 36 to younger than me. I don't purposely look for younger guys, as I've been on dates with older guys to this year. But 2 dates were with younger. First one months ago was 21, we had dinner & I felt kinda odd cause age gap. Today, I went on a walk date with a guy also 21. But from the getgo I felt so wrong. He looked so damn young and it just threw me off. What we were talking about and just how young twink he looked. I told myself what am I doing. After the date I sat in my car was like why am I attracted to young guys. Yes they look cute/hot and what not fun wise. But we are in different stages of life and it just looks odd. Idk why it took me until now, 33, to realize I need to really close the gap and make it 5 years up or down. At what age did you exp this & what helped/helps you stick to dating your age?

(I don't expect all of these things check marked off, But Cuddling, near my age, & my non negotiables 💯)

WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR IN A (BF): Side whose near my age or younger here in the US. I like guys who are in the middle to leaning masc side (thin, lean, or some muscles). Gamer, active guy, Nerds. Someone whose funny/silly or who enjoys goofiness, chill & laid back, cuddling/physical touch, open-minded, monogamous, not easily angered.

Non-Negotiables: Religion, Politics, Drag, Drugs/Smoking of any kind, Poly, Illegal shit, Anal.

ME: 33, 6'2, Hairy Beefy Nerdy Bearded Jock. White with Mexican & German Roots. Goofy/Silly/random, cuddle monster, foodie, Homebody

MY interests: Gym, Sports, Arts&Crafts, Arcades, Anime, gaming, Huge Nerd that goes to Cons, Kinks/fetish.

My Green Flags: Empathetic/emotionally available, Silly, Medical & Random knowledge about things, down to Earth, Good mental health, active, good driver, responsible, professional job.

My Red Flags: I'm quiet around ppl I don't know, somewhat Median personality, can talk about random stuff or change conversations at wrong times, laugh when I'm bothered/confused, sometimes needs alone time to recharge/likes to do some things alone. I have Heat intolerance, meaning when it is 80° or more Outside my body overheats & doesn't sweat enough to lower my body temperature. I Don't Do any of the following: drink or smoke/use substances, concerts.

Like it's hard enough for us to find Sides around our age, but everytime I do I have 0 in common with the other. 33 American, living in Illinois.

I Don't drink or use any kind of substance, no concerts/raves, no drag, no poly.

I'm a homebody gym Rat beefy guy whose down to Earth, chill, loves cuddling/physical touch, sports, art, gaming, anime, some traveling, & going to Cons or being outdoors in nature. I have socials but rarely on them. I can't seem to find anyone who relates to me in even some of these interests. Mostly looking for someone who has the same NO's.

Also, Do you guys think will ever have an app for us homebody sides?

I go out with guys every year. I talk to them a lot, I share interests, ask questions, listen to them. But if I don't talk to/make conversation/add to Their talk with the bartender, I'm hit with stop being shy/you're too shy. It annoys the piss out of me. Not everyone is an extreme social bug that talks to everyone in sight. My bios do mention I'm Homebody/Nerd.

Thinking about Finally driving down to Pride Fest.

Is there anything artsy to do, shop vendors, or sports stuff to participate in there? Nerdy jock 😅

I don't drink or do concerts/raves.

I'm a Dom in the Streets, Kinky Sub in the Sheets type of Guy. 33, White/Tan Hairy Beefy Nerdy Tall Jock here.
(I like guys around my age or younger, opposite of me (Thin/Lean guys or guys with only some muscle build). The Problem is that guys like that are sub and/or not into me.
Curious if anyone else has same experience or how are you finding these guys? I live 40mins from Chicago
(Grindr, Scruff, & Recon) are of No help 😞