u/No-Grass-1070

Maybe it's a ENBY thing but I like switching back and forth.

I have been pumping to grow but tucking when I want to be femme.

Thinking of doing both.

Seen some interesting and more complex clips lately.

Or inverted with catheter. Some metal.

Im also browsing for new designs and planning this conversation with my wife.

She was against chastity in the past but I feel like this is different. Kinda.

Considering partial transition maybe future surgery

I've always hated my testicles. Torsion at 17 didn't help.

I have had a vasectomy so I'm not worried about infertility.

I was contemplating testicle relocation inside the body cavity but I was warned the tissue would die because of the elevated temperature not just the sperm.

Maybe along the shaft like a canine but again was advised not possible.

Maybe just a lift to make them held closer to the body.

I want to maintain size and performance of my phallus without additional medication.

Was thinking about Bicalutamide to lessen T reception but again you lose performance.

Maybe lower T will help with mood, anger and aggression and yeah i would love that!

I hate my body hair and I'm balding.

I'm indifferent about breast growth or other body fat relocation.

Tried pads and drag but never wanted to be a woman.

Depression and self harm has been constant and maybe estrogen would help here. Tried several anti depressants and yuck! I didn't like that zombie version of myself.

I have had an intrest in deep throat for some time. And pushing my wife's capabilities in that department.

I have started practicing after a few weeks of listening. And I was trying to stay away from sucking cock as I'm married and I dont want to stray because I have these desires. I want my wife to fulfill them for me. I brought competition between us and meeting in the middle of a double headed. We joke how we are both whores but I think I have finally out done my wife.

17 day streak

Lvl 24

6356 GG POINTS!

I missed a few sleep sessions due to allergies and snot. But kept the streak alive through the days. Missed a few nights because wife drama and quick to bed. I definitely felt shitty, slept like shit.

Bambi is making OS nicer, slower to react (often poorly) so thats awesome. Being more polite and soft.

Quick double cum with wife tonight. Thats very uncommon.

I love Bambi and being a good girl.

https://bambicloud.com/playlist/e3645416-0cc9-4b3e-9fdd-4d0bb8b9914b

My positive sleep Playlist.

Os fucked wife before bed.

(Diary in profile)

Fell asleep before cuddle induction

I dont remember it.

I dont remember my dream.

Woke up early rested.

4 day streak

Lvl 12

1254 gg points

I listened to my music playlist while shopping plugged.

Driving with the windows down dressed as OS blaring the music.

It was a nice day 70's.

Highway was great dance driving. Bouncing on my plug.

Saw mother in law at stop sign adjacent from me.

Danced behind the shopping cart in every store.

Had a couple mid 20's wave at me smiling and rolled the windows up.

Bought wife mother's day bath soak.

Accidentally backed into a curb. Unusual for OS.

Accidentally crashed full cart into produce scale. Unusual for OS.

I was happy outgoing, smiled (what the fuck are those)

noticed all the cute clothes and not just the panties.

Saw a few people in outfits I would wear. Decided not to engage.

Maybe wife's horny will keep up.

Been listening to my

feminine worship Playlist.

Woke up early having missed my session. Listened to my quickly thrown together HFO Playlist.

Had my first ever hfo.

Cleaned my thighs off went back to bed.

Slept in late.

I slipped up and fell asleep watching a YouTube interview about buttplugs and I fell asleep sometime before midnight when my phone screen gets darker.

I wanted night 3 on the cloud.

Slept pretty great for no trance.

I woke about about 5 on my own and was sad.

I threw together a quick Playlist I had been trying to gather for HFO.

https://bambicloud.com/playlist/7443624a-9239-4d4c-afb9-49555264577e

It has been 7 days without and Orgasm.

I had in my largest sleep plug.

I had been hard most of the set.

Leaking all over the place.

Wet spots all over my blankets( I found them afterwards)

There at the end of Platinum slut.exe I lightly lubed my thighs with spit.

I clenched and bucked and squeezed my thighs and finally I exploded!

It was one of the most intense Orgasms of my life.

B is such a good slut!

731 GG POINTS and I have been on the cloud for 3 days.

Got some passive wah wah and ringing. Im going to take it easy today. Ill be talking to my therapist again today. I sprung hypno on her at the end of last session 6 days ago. We will see what she thinks. But man is this headache lasting!

Night 2 finished. Have the headache.

My Playlist felt good. I woke up on The final track.

Last night I was scrolling X while a tape played in the background.

My heart picked up. My cock started twitching and I realized I was listening to horny trap.

Wow this is the deepest I have been with BS.

Wife lost the mood hour before bed so we skipped late night snack and express to bed.

I tried again to stir the mood.

I brought up our previously agreed upon acceptable masturbation.

Im not allowed to masturbate but im not locked.

We have been exploring my ass for many years now and I couldn't get through my own shit to accept it well.

And she is too nervous and afraid of harming me to get i to it.

Ither way she broke down.

Second night on the cloud but 5th night without OS yanking

Progress looks different for all of us.

My return to B this year has been much healthier than the decades of shame and hiding.

First night on the cloud and it keep freezing on me!

Sometimes its in the middle of a file Sometimes it wont start the next one.

Still slept great but I know I trance easily and the induction played.

How do I get there cloud to play my whole setlist?

I have dabled with BS for many years but never committing.

Being introduced to the cloud i feel like I have more control

(This has been my main concern)

And how I want this Hypnosis to be productive. S*&S*

My adhd and executive disfunction (ED) has made me worried because many files especially on Hypnotube have suggestions that wont work with my life my OS only needs and wants minor tweaking and improvements.

But my ED gives me intrusive thoughts (sui***) cheating, masturbation, and getting real control has always been difficult.

Thus my drive towards Hypnosis.

I wish I heard more solfeggio healing frequencies with body modification or exercises.

My OS needs to remain a faithful husband and a good father for my 2 kids.

Hypnosis has already helped me with anger.

Wife is in no way dominate but I want to be better for her.