Sometimes when I see someone hot on the street/at a bar/concert I just want to fuck them so much I’m close to just approach them and ask if they’d like to fuck me. It’s even worse during ovulation. Would you agree for it? No small talk, just sex. It messes with my head so much that I’m aroused just by looking at people and thinking about such scenarios.
I’m bi but homoromantic. Around ovulation I get VERY horny and I crave to be filled by a dick. It’s overwhelming. I don’t understand my urges. I sometimes wish I could have an open relationship to explore that but under all those raw fantasies there’s just a pure need to be seen and loved and that’s sth that I already have. I love my partner but on sexual level sometimes I feel like we’re not fully compatible and I panic that she’s not the right one. We’re together for quite a long time which doesn’t help the desire when I’m it’s highly driven by novelties, strangers and some forbidden fruits.
I’d say that I’m a quite sexual person but I suppress it because every single time I let it free I lose control.
How can I deal with all that? I don’t want to love anyone else but I want to fuck someone else as well. It doesn’t need to be a regular partner. I just want an occasional hookup with someone I find hot and feel horny for.
I also realised quite recently that good and safe relationships seem boring for traumatised people who got used to constant change and stress in toxic relationships.
Ughh sorry for venting