u/Queen_Katastrophe

I think too many dommes are chasing whales instead of building a roster.

Don't get me wrong... I absolutely think you should shoot for the stars when setting your goals. Dream big. Push yourself. Help your subs reach full oftentimes. But your expectations and your strategy should still be grounded in reality.

I've seen dommes ignore or even turn away subs with moderate budgets because they're convinced a whale is just around the corner. Meanwhile, those "smaller" supporters could have become consistent contributors if they had been valued instead of dismissed.

You don't have to hit your goals through one person. Multiple loyal, consistent supporters can get you there too, and often create a much more stable foundation than relying on a single whale.

I'd rather build a community of people who genuinely enjoy supporting me than spend all my energy waiting for a fantasy client who may never show up.

Am I looking at this the wrong way, or has the obsession with whales become a little too common?

I think too many dommes are chasing whales instead of building a roster.

Don't get me wrong... I absolutely think you should shoot for the stars when setting your goals. Dream big. Push yourself. Help your subs reach full oftentimes. But your expectations and your strategy should still be grounded in reality.

I've seen dommes ignore or even turn away subs with moderate budgets because they're convinced a whale is just around the corner. Meanwhile, those "smaller" supporters could have become consistent contributors if they had been valued instead of dismissed.

You don't have to hit your goals through one person. Multiple loyal, consistent supporters can get you there too, and often create a much more stable foundation than relying on a single whale.

I'd rather build a community of people who genuinely enjoy supporting me than spend all my energy waiting for a fantasy client who may never show up.

Am I looking at this the wrong way, or has the obsession with whales become a little too common?

I've been thinking about something that's been bothering me for a minute.

Multiple times I have seen "BNWO" content and rhetoric being used by white dommes. BNWO wasn't created because there wasn't already enough room for white dommes to succeed. It emerged because Black women have historically been marginalized, fetishized, and overlooked, even within kink and findom spaces. It became a niche where Black dommes could reclaim power on our own terms.

So when white dommes decide they belong in BNWO because they have a Black partner or happen to play with a man with a BBC, it feels like another example of taking up space that wasn't created for them.

💖 Not every niche needs to be for everyone. 💖

Supporting Black dommes is different from centering yourself in a community that exists because of the unique experiences of Black dominants.

I'm curious about other perspectives on this. Where do you draw the line? What do you think about non-Black dommes trying to take on dominant roles in BNWO?