u/agnostic_Aardvark92

So I've made a post before I have only been with one guy when I was much younger but now 35 a good 15 years later I keep getting these cravings it started with gay porn then sexting and sharing photos and vids on apps with men then I found my self browsing womens underwear and sex toys.

Every time I'd back out and be like, "What am I doing?" This isn't me, but the urges always returned .

I want to be fucked by a dominant man or an older man ,I would talk to men then back out at the last moment .

Then one afternoon the urge hit at the right time fuck it I thought I'm gonna experience a man again, if I hate it I hate it but at least I'll have answers I found a near by gay hang out .I dressed up a lil more than I usually do ,I cleaned my self up , put on some skippy underwear and left with determination.

I get to this bar by my self my heart pounding, no one was really giving me any signals that I noticed so I thought I'd hit the bar and lose some of my Inhibitions.

a couple of drinks and a few random chats later I was at the bar again I dropped my phone while trying to pay and as I bent over to grab it my ass pressed against the man behind me a spark of excitement shot through me as I could almost make out the shape of his dick against my butt, I awkwardly shot up

"shit my bad,sorry"

and there he was a grizzled big guy he was taller than me (im 6'3 and somewhere between chunky and slim) but he made me feel smallish he had an extremely masculine face too. He just smiled at me "yeah no problem mate " I walked off feeling like an idiot ,all I could think was that's the guy ,that's the type of guy I want to fuck me .

an hour or so passed, me still awkwardly making small talk with some people. Then I saw him again he was on the dance floor, okay it's now or never I moved to where he was and began dancing as sexy as I could

(god I felt like an idiot I was like am I trying to lure him in like im an animal, trying to present myself might as well stick my naked ass to his face)

but I thought a couple of more secs and I'm done then a slight brushing of bodies one of us had closed the distance but I wasn't about ask who. I arched my ass towards him a little and he answer back now I could definitely feel his dick my heart began pacing

shit am I actually doing this

Then a firm hand grabed my waist and pulled me back even more I was grinding on him to my hearts content then he started kissing my neck. Eventually after some gratuitous grinding he turn me around and he introduced him self, we grabbed some drinks and headed outside we chatted a bit and he was a guys guy we had alot in commen, landed up speaking about MMA alot then as things were winding down he asked

"hey what's your plans for the night"

"I awkwardly stumbled on my words yeah ah nothing really "

"Do you want to come back to my place" he confidently asked

(Shit,shit,shit wait I'm doing this I thought)

"Um yeah sure "

while we waited for an uber he pulled me into a side street and we began making out while he felt me up, I hadn't kissed a guy in 15 years but this was intoxicating .

In the uber he kept touching me and holding my inner thigh .

His place was nice ,he asked what I wanted to drink and then took off his shirt

God he had a thick strong build he closed the distance as he saw me eying his waist. we began making out again but I think he sensed my nervousness so he backed off a bit .

Drinks,music and video games were the remedy . things we're kinda platonic now

I left to go to the bathroom and gave myself a pep talk

I came back a bit more confident ironically nas NY state of mind came on a song I love I walked over as feminine as I could carry myself

He watched me with a devilish smile . I straddled myself on top of his lap his hands wrapped around my waist as I awkwardly danced on top of him he pulled my shirt off and began kissing my body . I was basically bursting out my pants at this point ,he pulled my head down by the back of my neck and kissed me . we did this routine for a bit and then he lifted up with me.

I think for a second he forgot that I'm not the smallest guy so the lift was a bit clumsy and awkward we both kinda chuckled but then he had me . My legs wraped around his waist ,his hands had found leverage by way of my bum cheeks . He carried me to his bedroom where he kinda dropped me on the bed to be honest, but he made me feal kinda cute by carrying me so I give him a pass.

He began pulling my pants down and to be honest the skimpy underwear served no purpose it came off pretty quick

Before I could really have a moment to be a little shocked at what I was doing my legs where in the air and he was eating me out , I kept squirming in delight while . He was working over time his hands and tounge my dick and hole everything was being covered then he stopped and stood up and undid his belt and dropped his pants

To be honest I took a moment his dick was thick and almost grotesque not in an ugly way but in an almost alien way it was like watching some one paint a painting with a hammer I don't know if that makes sense but anyway

He almost silently gestured me to his dick

Oh right my turn I thought

I lifted myself up towards his dick feeling like an intimidated snake charmer

I wrapped my hand around the base of his dick feeling just how hard he was, I put the tip of my lips around his head it was so bulbous so smooth and then in it went , down a little further each time .

Then while I felt I was really in the motion of things his large hand wraped around the back of my head and forced my face down...down again and then one last thrust this time I almost gagged he pulled my hair back and smiled at me he lowerd him self onto me like a crane lowering a large stack of bricks

We both slowly edged our self up the bed. He grabbed some lube from the side of his bed and gave us both a healthy slather

I asked him to be slow as it's basically my first time I felt his head enter me slowly then a bit more and then a bit more and then....I felt his pelvis hit against my butt as I gasped in pleasure , he began fucking me hard but slow, moans began to escape my mouth unconsciously and then

Fuck me, I began to beg him

Yeah he responded you want me to fuck you

Yeah

You want me to breed you

Yes...please I let out in a moan

you want me to fill you up he began panting as his efforts quickened

he hunched over me now aware of the mission then there it was an almost blissful silence fell over us....

And then moaning as he arched his head back and pulled my hips towards him I reached for my dick as I watched his face contort while his cock pulsed inside me filling me up with every spray, it took me but a few seconds before I burst , my cum took flight landed well past my head .

There is a bit of a continuation to the story that'll I'll post in a couple of days.

So I've made a post before I have only been with one guy when I was much younger but now a good 15 years later I keep getting these cravings it started with gay porn then sexting and sharing photos and vids on apps with men then I found my self browsing womens underwear and sex toys.

Every time I'd back out and be like what am I doing this isn't me but the urges always returned .

I want to be fucked by a dominant man or an older man ,I would talk to men then back out at the last moment .

Then one afternoon the urge hit at the right time fuck it I thought I'm gonna experience a man again, if I hate it I hate it but at least I'll have answers I found a near by gay hang out .I dressed up a lil more than I usually do ,I cleaned my self up , put on some skippy underwear and left with determination.

I get to this bar by my self my heart pounding, no one was really giving me any signals that I noticed so I thought I'd hit the bar and lose some of my Inhibitions.

a couple of drinks and a few random chats later I was at the bar again I dropped my phone while trying to pay and as I bent over to grab it my ass pressed against the man behind me a spark of excitement shot through me as I could almost make out the shape of his dick against my butt, I awkwardly shot up

"shit my bad,sorry"

and there he was a grizzled big guy he was taller than me (im 6'3 and somewhere between chunky and slim) but he made me feel smallish he had an extremely masculine face too. He just smiled at me "yeah no problem mate " I walked off feeling like an idiot ,all I could think was that's the guy ,that's the type of guy I want to fuck me .

an hour or so passed, me still awkwardly making small talk with some people. Then I saw him again he was on the dance floor, okay it's now or never I moved to where he was and began dancing as sexy as I could

(god I felt like an idiot I was like am I trying to lure him in like im an animal, trying to present myself might as well stick my naked ass to his face)

but I thought a couple of more secs and I'm done then a slight brushing of bodies one of us had closed the distance but I wasn't about ask who. I arched my ass towards him a little and he answer back now I could definitely feel his dick my heart began pacing

shit am I actually doing this

Then a firm hand grabed my waist and pulled me back even more I was grinding on him to my hearts content then he started kissing my neck. Eventually after some gratuitous grinding he turn me around and he introduced him self, we grabbed some drinks and headed outside we chatted a bit and he was a guys guy we had alot in commen, landed up speaking about MMA alot then as things were winding down he asked

"hey what's your plans for the night"

"I awkwardly stumbled on my words yeah ah nothing really "

"Do you want to come back to my place" he confidently asked

(Shit,shit,shit wait I'm doing this I thought)

"Um yeah sure "

while we waited for an uber he pulled me into a side street and we began making out while he felt me up, I hadn't kissed a guy in 15 years but this was intoxicating .

In the uber he kept touching me and holding my inner thigh .

His place was nice ,he asked what I wanted to drink and then took off his shirt

God he had a thick strong build he closed the distance as he saw me eying his waist. we began making out again but I think he sensed my nervousness so he backed off a bit .

Drinks,music and video games were the remedy . things we're kinda platonic now

I left to go to the bathroom and gave myself a pep talk

I came back a bit more confident ironically nas NY state of mind came on a song I love I walked over as feminine as I could carry myself

He watched me with a devilish smile . I straddled myself on top of his lap his hands wrapped around my waist as I awkwardly danced on top of him he pulled my shirt off and began kissing my body . I was basically bursting out my pants at this point ,he pulled my head down by the back of my neck and kissed me . we did this routine for a bit and then he lifted up with me.

I think for a second he forgot that I'm not the smallest guy so the lift was a bit clumsy and awkward we both kinda chuckled but then he had me . My legs wraped around his waist ,his hands had found leverage by way of my bum cheeks . He carried me to his bedroom where he kinda dropped me on the bed to be honest, but he made me feal kinda cute by carrying me so I give him a pass.

He began pulling my pants down and to be honest the skimpy underwear served no purpose it came off pretty quick

Before I could really have a moment to be a little shocked at what I was doing my legs where in the air and he was eating me out , I kept squirming in delight while . He was working over time his hands and tounge my dick and hole everything was being covered then he stopped and stood up and undid his belt and dropped his pants

To be honest I took a moment his dick was thick and almost grotesque not in an ugly way but in an almost alien way it was like watching some one paint a painting with a hammer I don't know if that makes sense but anyway

He almost silently gestured me to his dick

Oh right my turn I thought

I lifted myself up towards his dick feeling like an intimidated snake charmer

I wrapped my hand around the base of his dick feeling just how hard he was, I put the tip of my lips around his head it was so bulbous so smooth and then in it went , down a little further each time .

Then while I felt I was really in the motion of things his large hand wraped around the back of my head and forced my face down...down again and then one last thrust this time I almost gagged he pulled my hair back and smiled at me he lowerd him self onto me like a crane lowering a large stack of bricks

We both slowly edged our self up the bed. He grabbed some lube from the side of his bed and gave us both a healthy slather

I asked him to be slow as it's basically my first time I felt his head enter me slowly then a bit more and then a bit more and then....I felt his pelvis hit against my butt as I gasped in pleasure , he began fucking me hard but slow, moans began to escape my mouth unconsciously and then

Fuck me, I began to beg him

Yeah he responded you want me to fuck you

Yeah

You want me to breed you

Yes...please I let out in a moan

you want me to fill you up he began panting as his efforts quickened

he hunched over me now aware of the mission then there it was an almost blissful silence fell over us....

And then moaning as he arched his head back and pulled my hips towards him I reached for my dick as I watched his face contort while his cock pulsed inside me filling me up with every spray, it took me but a few seconds before I burst , my cum took flight landed well past my head .

There is a bit of a continuation to the story that'll I'll post in a couple of days.

So I got some DMs because of my last post, so I thought I shared more lil stories of me and Jim for Part 1. See :

​

https://www.reddit.com/r/gaystoriesgonewild/s/eN94A98kmJ

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The first time

​

We were at a house party. me and I were pretty wasted and got an Uber back to my place. By now, we had had a few experiences with each other but no real penetration . But tonight would be my night I thought with combo of being super horny and rather drunk I could fight through the lil bit of pain his big cock caused so before he could get in my room I was already face down ass up he seemed pretty enthusiastic and dropped his pant took off his shirt (he had a pretty hot body hard abs ,deep cum gutters juicy pecs all to match his massive cock) I arched my back a little more he walked foward and grabbed my ass with one hand and started getting his dick ready with the other .once he was as hard as a mountain made of granite he drooled some spit on to his cock and he lubed it up he then began slapping my hole with he's cock as if he was trying to play some rhythm that would open the gate once my hole was pretty moist he looked down and spat a lil on my ass he used his hand to massage the saliva in and around my hole then he started to sick his cock in and slowly we made head way, I got a bit impatient and thought fuck it I'm drunk we've got a bit of lube . So I reached behind me grabbed him and pulled him forward there was a sharp pain but by the gods there was pleasure , he had definitely split me open a bit but I would not be detered I told him slowly don't move to much let's just ease into the rhythm he began by moving his hips a in a circle ,then there was a slow gentle back and forth then he would go fully out and fully in and before long like a fucking stallion let loose he was galloping. He was pounding me the way I wanted him to all this time. I Couldn't help but moan"aaah fuck,yes, please....fuck me me being overzealous also jerked myself off way to early and came every where (I do think he appreciated the pulsating though) and he kept going and then a blissful silence his hands grabed my hips and they tensed up I could feel his power his domination over me and he let out an "fuck...dont move" as he filled me up he gave me to more thrusts just to make sure he was in deep enough. he stayed in there as he went limp inside me when he pulled out I remeber the cum leaking out me it was still so warm .

​

Head amongst friends

​

One weekend we went on tour with our waterpolo club but not getting in the room situation early enough meant me and Jim weren't sharing . So one night we decided to have a movie night in our room couple of beers , good movies why not Jim got on my bed with me and the others scatter around the room and on the other bed.it got later and mostly every one had left I couldn't handle the tension any more . I exclaimed I'm going to be and threw the covers over my head and Jim's body I had jim turn on his side so he could block me with his back as I went down I grabbed his hard cock and started licking it like it was favourite flavour lollipop with a gooey center 😋. We had all the time in the world so I thought I'd do this slow I locked my lips around his cock and begun giving him head slowly and passionately never picking up the pace I could feel his frustration but I wanted to edge him to make him worship me I carried on with increments of deep throating him until I would silently start to gag a bit on his massive cock and then with no warning, no grabbing my head ,no nothing he exploded with more cum then my mouth could hold it came out like a godamn gattling gun filling my cheeks up like I was a hamster storing nuts for winter .I took one big gulp and Down it went . He was very appreciative.

​

Cliche gym session

​

It was winter so we did water polo at the gym near by which had an indoor pool. Training was over everyone was leaving but I wanted to hit the sauna before I could get in the Sauna Jim said why don't we do the steam room there's no one in there . I obviously knew what this meant so in I went towel only nothing underneath as I sat down Jim sat on the step above me he opened his legs wide enough that I could see his big dick dangling, teasing me. It was already semi hard luckily the steam was.....rather steamy and the room was tucked away enough it wasnt that easy to just see what was happening I stuck my head under his tell and sucked down on his juicy sweaty cock he gestured for me to stop him sat down next to me and began jerking me off . But we stoped just in time for any one to notice us as people came in. now we had to leave while hiding our bonners not fun. We went to the showers across from each other Jim popped in to mine pushed me up against the wall sucked on his to fingers and fingered me hard against the wall .I had had enough of the teasing so I wrapped my towel around me and went into one of the cubicles there was a quite knock on the door I opened Jim quickly closed the door behind him he shoved me against the wall licked he's fingers and began finger fucking me again and when I was ready he shoved his rock hard cock deep inside me I'm sure people knew what was happening. there was substantial ass clapping. Before I could let out a moan he shoved his hand in my mouth and I bit down on he's fingers as he kept fucking Like there was no tomorrow I began jerking off accept this time I was patient ,he pulled me off the wall and bent me over the toilet and then came a series of hard passionate thrust he whisperd hard "Im gonna cum" I began perking off as he began to fill me I exploded all over the floor and toilet. He pulled out and left before I could even get my thoughts together.

Growing up, I had a best friend. we'll call him Jim Jim's brother, and mine were best friends too. We did everything together we were in the swim team we both played 1st team waterpolo he was a lot more masculine he was shorter and pretty jacked I was taller and slender with pretty feminine hips(still am 😉) .

Cut to one night we were in University and my parents were away so I had a house party .

When we all went to bed, all the beds were occupied, but there was space in mine, so Jim joined me like he had for many years, but this time, something awoken in me.I had been 95 percent straight at this point and same with him.

I decided I would take my jocks off and gauge the situation.I stuck my ass out until he noticed "Wtf dude or you naked" I just said "Dude its hot chill" he fussed but I stayed naked and then I felt a plastic object against my hole I pushed back it went deep in me he pulled it out then there was silence for a moment and then there was this warm object that brushed along my crack ,wait did he...surely not .so I pushed .my butt out a little more and with out warning he grabbed my hips and tried to ram his cock in my hole being my first time it was way to sore to go through with but I wasn't willing to let this moment go I grabbed his cock and put it in my mouth the head of his dick was huge it felt so smooth and warm on my lips I began to give him head and deep throating every now and then just as I felt we had began he grabbed my head forced my face down and busted a hot load down my throat.

We would go on to have quite a few sexcapades in secret. I had fully become his bottom toy .

One fateful night, his parents were away this time, and he had a house party there. towards the end of the night I went into the kitchen to get some shot glasses while reaching for them in the cupboard I felt his hands grab my hips and he began kissing and nibbling my neck (This was kinda unusual as it was normally just sex no real intimacy) he then turn me around grabbed my ass picked me up and and seated me on the counter he grabbed my neck and began to kiss me I couldn't pull away I wanted him I wrapped my legs around him and groped his hard cock but we stopped before we were caught

throughout the rest of the night he would come behind the bar while no one was looking and finger me ,play with my cock and grab my ass eventually we all went to bed he made it that we would take his parents bedroom

before the door could close behind us he grabbed me and pulled my clothes off, he picked me up again and gently laid me on the bed he began sucking my dick as if his life depended on it he threw my legs up and began to lick my tight hole (he had never done this) and omg it felt amazing he ate my ass for some time then he stood up pulled me up and shoved his cock deep down my throat he began face fucking me to the point there was drool and body fluid all over the show, he pushed me back got on top of me and started kissing,sucking and licking my body he looked in my eyes for a second and this cheeky smile shot across his face he kissed me and pulled my legs up so he could get get in deep he wanted to fuck me missionary not something we had ever done before he began thrusting ,he would kiss and bite my neck in-between. He pulled he's head up and kept fucking while he's hand pinned my body down again our eyes locked. he then ran his thum down my lips and pushed his thumb into my mouth. I began sucking on it like it was his thick cock ,he then pulled my jaw down and spat in my mouth then came the end he picked up the pace, grabbed my neck for the perfect amount of choke hi kissed me deep and began to breath deep breaths into my mouth then I felt it as it filled me up his cock began to pulsate and he thrust as he tried to shove everything he had into me breeding me the way I wanted . He was a gentleman and blew me until I busted in his mouth and the night came to a glorious lustful end.

Unfortunately we didn't know but thus would be the last time both for sex and friend. One of our friends nearly caught us and it kinda collapsed the friend group in a quite awkward way but I still have the memories

Growing up, I had a best friend. we'll call him Jim Jim's brother, and mine were best friends too. We did everything together we were in the swim team we both played 1st team waterpolo he was a lot more masculine he was shorter and pretty jacked I was taller and slender with pretty feminine hips(still am 😉) .

Cut to one night we were in University and my parents were away so I had a house party .

When we all went to bed, all the beds were occupied, but there was space in mine, so Jim joined me like he had for many years, but this time, something awoken in me.

I decided I would take my jocks off and gauge the situation. I stuck my ass out until he noticed "Wtf dude or you naked" I just said "Dude its hot chill" he fussed but i stayed naked and then I felt a plastic object against my hole I pushed back in it went deep in me he pulled it out then there was silence for a moment and then there was this warm object that brushed along my crack ,wait did he...surely not .so I pushed .my butt out a little more and with out warning he grabbed my hips and tried to ram his cock in to my hole being my first time it was way to sore to go through with but I was willing to let this moment go I grabbed his cock and put it in my mouth the head of his dick was huge it felt so smooth and warm on my lips I began to give him head do and deep throating every now and then just as I felt we had began he grab ed my head forced my face down and busted a hot load down my throat.

We would go on to have quite a few sexcapades in secret. I had fully become his bottom toy .

One fateful night, his parents were away this time, and he had a house party there. towards the end of the night I went into the kitchen to get some shot glasses while reaching for them in the cupboard I felt his hands grab my hips and he began kissing and nibbling my neck (This was kinda unusual as it was normally just sex no real intimacy) he then turn me around grabbed my ass picked me up and and seated me on the counter he grabbed my neck and began to kiss me I couldn't pull away I wanted him I wrapped my legs around him and groped his hard cock but we stopped before we were caught

throughout the rest of the night he would come behind the bar while no one was looking and finger me ,play with my cock and grab my ass eventually we all went to bed he made it that we would take his parents bedroom

before the door could close behind us he grabbed me and pulled my clothes off, he picked me up again and gently laid me on the bed he began sucking my dick as if his life depended on it he threw my legs up and began to lick my tight hole (he had never done this) and omg it felt amazing he ate my ass for some time then he stood up pulled me up and shoved his cock deep down my throat he began face fucking me to the point there was drool and body fluid all over the show, he pushed me back got on top of me and started kissing,sucking and licking my body he looked in my eyes for a second and this cheeky smile shot across his face he kissed me and pulled my legs up so he could get get in deep he wanted to fuck me missionary not something we had ever done before he began thrusting ,he would kiss and bite my neck in-between. He pulled he's head up and kept fucking while he's hand pinned my body down again our eyes locked. he then ran his thum down my lips and pushed his thumb into my mouth. I began sucking on it like it was his thick cock ,he then pulled my jaw down and spat in my mouth then came the end he picked up the pace, grabbed my neck for the perfect amount of choke hi kissed me deep and began to breath deep breaths into my mouth then I felt it as it filled me up his cock began to pulsate and he thrust as he tried to shove everything he had into me breeding me the way I wanted . He was a gentleman and blew me until I busted in his mouth and the night came to a glorious lustful end.

Unfortunately we didn't know but thus would be the last time both for sex and friend. One of our friends nearly caught us and it kinda collapsed the friend group in a quite awkward way but I still have the memories.

Growing up, I had a best friend. we'll call him Jim Jim's brother, and mine were best friends too. We did everything together we were in the swim team we both played 1st team waterpolo he was a lot more masculine he was shorter and pretty jacked I was taller and slender with pretty feminine hips(still am 😉) .

Cut to one night we were in University and my parents were away so I had a house party .

When we all went to bed, all the beds were occupied, but there was space in mine, so Jim joined me like he had for many years, but this time, something awoken in me.

I decided I would take my jocks off and gauge the situation. I stuck my ass out until he noticed "Wtf dude or you naked" I just said "Dude its hot chill" he fussed but i stayed naked and then I felt a plastic object against my hole I pushed back in it went deep in me he pulled it out then there was silence for a moment and then there was this warm object that brushed along my crack ,wait did he...surely not .so I pushed .my butt out a little more and with out warning he grabbed my hips and tried to ram his cock in to my hole being my first time it was way to sore to go through with but I was willing to let this moment go I grabbed his cock and put it in my mouth the head of his dick was huge it felt so smooth and warm on my lips I began to give him head do and deep throating every now and then just as I felt we had began he grab ed my head forced my face down and busted a hot load down my throat.

We would go on to have quite a few sexcapades in secret. I had fully become his bottom toy .

One fateful night, his parents were away this time, and he had a house party there. towards the end of the night I went into the kitchen to get some shot glasses while reaching for them in the cupboard I felt his hands grab my hips and he began kissing and nibbling my neck (This was kinda unusual as it was normally just sex no real intimacy) he then turn me around grabbed my ass picked me up and and seated me on the counter he grabbed my neck and began to kiss me I couldn't pull away I wanted him I wrapped my legs around him and groped his hard cock but we stopped before we were caught

throughout the rest of the night he would come behind the bar while no one was looking and finger me ,play with my cock and grab my ass eventually we all went to bed he made it that we would take his parents bedroom

before the door could close behind us he grabbed me and pulled my clothes off, he picked me up again and gently laid me on the bed he began sucking my dick as if his life depended on it he threw my legs up and began to lick my tight hole (he had never done this) and omg it felt amazing he ate my ass for some time then he stood up pulled me up and shoved his cock deep down my throat he began face fucking me to the point there was drool and body fluid all over the show, he pushed me back got on top of me and started kissing,sucking and licking my body he looked in my eyes for a second and this cheeky smile shot across his face he kissed me and pulled my legs up so he could get get in deep he wanted to fuck me missionary not something we had ever done before he began thrusting ,he would kiss and bite my neck in-between. He pulled he's head up and kept fucking while he's hand pinned my body down again our eyes locked. he then ran his thum down my lips and pushed his thumb into my mouth. I began sucking on it like it was his thick cock ,he then pulled my jaw down and spat in my mouth then came the end he picked up the pace, grabbed my neck for the perfect amount of choke hi kissed me deep and began to breath deep breaths into my mouth then I felt it as it filled me up his cock began to pulsate and he thrust as he tried to shove everything he had into me breeding me the way I wanted . He was a gentleman and blew me until I busted in his mouth and the night came to a glorious lustful end.

Unfortunately, we didn't know, but this would be the last time both for sex and friendship. One of our friends nearly caught us, and it kinda collapsed the friend group in a quite awkward way, but I still have the memories.