u/mindlessdepartures

"Witty banter." "Flirty chemistry." "Looking for a spark." I feel like I've read those words so many times I've forgotten what they mean. Here's a more honest attempt to describe who I actually am.

• I'm vain: I care about how I show up. Not just in how I look (I work out, and 9/10 paid actors agree I'm attractive), but also in making sure the effort is actually felt
• I'm easily distracted: I'll follow any thread to its inevitable end. I might just turn a throwaway comment into a discussion of cosmic luck or a heated argument about your favorite Trader Joe's snack. I love exploring a good rabbit hole, and all the way down we go
• I'm slow: I don't like skipping to the end. I enjoy the exploration and don't do anything I don't mean. Things worth taking seriously can't be rushed, and I want to show up with something that actually makes you smile
• I'm presumptuous: I like to think I know what people want before they do. I pick up on the small things that tell me when to bring playful chaos and when to focus on the quiet and real. I'll pull something from deep in the memory bank at the right moment to do something thoughtful. See? I was paying attention
• I'm obsessive: The conversation might end, but I want someone living rent free in my head. That yearning and fantasizing in between is what builds the intensity. I'm not a stalker, but I also understand that sounds like something a stalker would say

I know someone out there is dying to talk to a vain stalker with the attention span of a gnat. Ok, fine. Maybe I'm a lot, but I'm looking for someone who can match the energy. I enjoy reading, photography, exercising, being outdoors, and a variety of other random habits I've collected and discarded over the years. I'd love to learn what fascinates you, especially what music really gets you going.

A few practical things: I'm married with kids and a dog, central time zone US, content in my life and not looking to change anyone else's. I work from home, so time and availability aren't issues. No pressure or expectations beyond conversation, but I'm open to wherever it goes if the vibes are right. I know we've all got our own relationship issues, but if you're in a good place in your own life, we'll probably get along better for it.

"Witty banter." "Flirty chemistry." "Looking for a spark." I feel like I've read those words so many times I've forgotten what they mean. Here's a more honest attempt to describe who I actually am.

• I'm vain: I care about how I show up. Not just in how I look (I work out, and 9/10 paid actors agree I'm attractive), but also in making sure the effort is actually felt
• I'm easily distracted: I'll follow any thread to its inevitable end. I might just turn a throwaway comment into a discussion of cosmic luck or a heated argument about your favorite Trader Joe's snack. I love exploring a good rabbit hole, and all the way down we go
• I'm slow: I don't like skipping to the end. I enjoy the exploration and don't do anything I don't mean. Things worth taking seriously can't be rushed, and I want to show up with something that actually makes you smile
• I'm presumptuous: I like to think I know what people want before they do. I pick up on the small things that tell me when to bring playful chaos and when to focus on the quiet and real. I'll pull something from deep in the memory bank at the right moment to do something thoughtful. See? I was paying attention
• I'm obsessive: The conversation might end, but I want someone living rent free in my head. That yearning and fantasizing in between is what builds the intensity. I'm not a stalker, but I also understand that sounds like something a stalker would say

I know someone out there is dying to talk to a vain stalker with the attention span of a gnat. Ok, fine. Maybe I'm a lot, but I'm looking for someone who can match the energy. I enjoy reading, photography, exercising, being outdoors, and a variety of other random habits I've collected and discarded over the years. I'd love to learn what fascinates you, especially what music really gets you going.

A few practical things: I'm married with kids and a dog, central time zone US, content in my life and not looking to change anyone else's. I work from home, so time and availability aren't issues. No pressure or expectations beyond conversation, but I'm open to wherever it goes if the vibes are right. I know we've all got our own relationship issues, but if you're in a good place in your own life, we'll probably get along better for it.

Service(s) Needed: Telegram sexting session

Specifics (requests, kinks/fetishes, time requirements, etc.): I want to put on panties for you while you tease me in a sexy outfit and tell me some of your sluttiest sex stories

Budget: $100

Type of Seller I'm Looking For (age, race, dom/sub, body type, etc.): Native English speaker, must show face

Preferred Payment Method(s): CashApp, Venmo

Service(s) Needed: Telegram sexting session

Specifics (requests, kinks/fetishes, time requirements, etc.): I want to put on panties for you while you tease me in a sexy outfit and tell me some of your sluttiest sex stories

Budget: $100

Type of Seller I'm Looking For (age, race, dom/sub, body type, etc.): Native English speaker, must show face

Preferred Payment Method(s): CashApp, Venmo