u/needylittlekitaune

One thing I've realized recently is that I don't really have any submissive friends to talk to about this part of my life.

Most of the attention I get when I participate in BDSM spaces comes from men who are interested in becoming my Dom, and while I understand that's common, it can make it hard to find genuine connections with other submissives.

Sometimes I just want to talk with people who understand the mindset, share experiences, compare perspectives, or vent about the unique challenges of being submissive without it turning into flirting or someone trying to start a dynamic.

Does anyone else feel this way? Have you found meaningful friendships within the community, or is this something you've struggled with too?

I'd love to hear how other people have built a support system within BDSM, especially if those connections have stayed purely platonic

I've been thinking about this lately because I see people describe submission in really different ways. Some people talk about it like it's part of their identity, while others see it as something that only exists within a specific relationship or dynamic.

I'm not looking for a "right" answer, there really isn't one but I genuinely wonder how other people experience it.

For me I lean more towards something you are, even outside of kink or sex I naturally find myself in a more submissive role. It's not that I need someone telling me what to do all the time, but the way I communicate, connect with people, and relate to partners feels inherently submissive. BDSM just gives that part of me a place to exist more intentionally.