u/throwawaybull0

They're a longtime contributing member of the sub, "in good standing" so to speak, and a welcome addition to the team. Please welcome them on board, if you're so inclined.

I literally just made a mod post a week ago. I had no plans to do another this soon, but the rule violations were piling up, and it gets to a point 😭

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DICK PICS ARE NOT ALLOWED FROM SINGLE GUYS. IN ANY CAPACITY

Not bare. Not covered. Not as a print through clothing. Not with an emoji barely covering it. Not allowed. AT ALL

Yes, this is a NSFW sub. But, guys are overwhelmingly the majority in these places. If this rule didn't exist, you'd see nothing but 🍆 every time you opened the main page. Same way if we didn't enforce the "no sellers" rule, this page would be flooded with sellers and OF bots. This is about keeping the sub usable, not censorship or a power trip

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Most subs, with a bigger footprint, permanently ban single guys for dick pics on the first offense. No recourse. No reversal. And, there are enough single guys in these subs that they could ban 20 a day and not lose steam

When I first came on the team as a mod, that was the policy. I fought with the mod team and argued that it's not egregious enough an offense to warrant that, and that temporary warning bans should be the policy. And when I became head mod, I enforced that

But like I said, it's getting to a point. And, when it's guys with REPEAT offenses for dick pic violations, it's even more irritating because I spoke up for you to be able to keep posting to begin with 🙃

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So. This is an appeal, to the single guys in the sub. Please read the rules. Both about the dick pics. And about posting pictures with others in them. Just banned someone permanently today for posting a pic where her face was easily visible, while his was fully blurred out. He would've caught a 14 day ban regardless, but the violation of privacy made it egregious enough to be permanent

The policy is fairly lenient at the moment, especially compared to similar subs. If it keeps being an issue, it'll tighten up to what it used to be

Someone asked recently why we don't have a "live update" thread anymore, and I gave a bit of a half answer to it. But will elaborate more on why it was removed

To get straight to the point, it was done for privacy. Some people were using it to get way too invasive about people's whereabouts in the theater.

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There's a difference between "Sexy lady wanting a gangbang in the VIP, taking all comers. Come now before she's done!" and "Single female just walked into the store. Seeing if she'll go to the back" or "Couple now in the second private room. Not sure what they're doing yet. Will update."

First example has a bit of latitude, because the person having fun in the theater is obviously turning it into an event. Second and third examples aren't all that different from stalking. And we don't want that LOL

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No lady or couple is going to feel safe coming to these spaces if they feel, or if they hear, that there's a community of people online tracking their every movement whenever they show up to one of these places. And rightfully so. It's kinda creepy

Once again, there are situations where it's at least arguably okay to do. But not everyone knows where that line is, so for safety/privacy, we err on the side of caution in the sub

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So. That's why the "Lounge/Live Update" thread was removed a while back, and hasn't returned. If anyone has ideas on how we can bring it back in a way that's ethical and safe, the mod team is open to suggestions. Maybe something like 3 to 5 users in the sub who are allowed to give updates within specified guidelines. They, and the mods, would be the only ones who could give live updates from the theater. But, you could also know that their information is good

Either way, impetus has to come from the community. Not wanting just one person constantly giving updates whenever they're on the scene. So, the floor is open. If no one comments or has any ideas, will take the silence for consent and keep on with business as usual. But if you do, feel free to drop it, and maybe we can do something with it

Another example

Per the recent Mod Announcent post, flairs are now mandatory before posting. BUT, you do have the option of editing the text before submitting. So, just using this as an example to show how it's done

Hello, all

Popped the hood and did some long overdue work on the sub. Want to help improve the user experience a bit more tailored to what everyone is looking for, and thus hopefully lead to more successes. Will try to keep this short

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RULE TWEAK

Rule about privacy was more a common sense thing, but you know how the saying goes about how common sense ain't that common. So, rule is now officially on the books to prevent any confusion

Rules overall have been edited to be much clearer, to hopefully prevent any miscommunication

For those curious, this is the ban metric the mod team uses:

Ban policy

Number	Ban length
First	7 days
Second	14 days
Third	Permanent

Rare exceptions can be made depending on mod discretion, and the severity of the offense, but as a rule that's the metric

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Sidebar had the in-depth explanation of all the rules, which made it clunky and way too long. Has been shortened to be much easier to read

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USER FLAIR

User flair text can now be edited, with the existing emojis in them allowed. Custom flairs for high-contributing members (usually ladies or couples who are regulars and hold events, but with the odd exception) can be requested, and decision made by mods whether to grant

User flairs aren't a requirement, but now you have the option of selecting and editing one, to more accurately reflect yourself or what you're looking for

PLEASE DON'T ABUSE THIS BY TYPING WEIRD, CODED, OR ILLEGAL SHIT INTO THE FLAIRS. WILL REMOVE THAT ABILITY PROMPTLY IF THIS STARTS HAPPENING

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POST FLAIR

Posts are now required to be flaired before posting. But, the flairs can be edited, just like the user posts. Links to a couple examples are HERE and HERE. As you can see, you can tweak the text of the flair before hitting "Apply" and submitting the post. Putting this here a second time to reiterate:

PLEASE DON'T ABUSE THIS BY TYPING WEIRD, CODED, OR ILLEGAL SHIT INTO THE FLAIRS. WILL REMOVE THAT ABILITY PROMPTLY IF THIS STARTS HAPPENING

Most mods in NSFW subs wouldn't give this latitude, because of some of the shady people lurking in the background who'll abuse it. So to those who choose to, this is an extension of trust. Please don't fuck it up for everyone

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SIMILAR SUBREDDITS ADDED TO SIDEBAR

One of the most common reasons for post removal is the post being off-topic, or not related to bookstores/theaters. So, to hopefully help cut down on that, there's now a list of similar subs that are local and lifestyle-adjacent, even if not specific to this slice of the scene.

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That's it. Tried to keep this short. Hope, once again, that the tweaks in the flair process help make what each person is searching for a bit easier to find. If you happen to have any feedback, thoughts, suggestions, or so on, thread is open

As always, be safe, have fun, and stay kinky

User flair is optional, and can be edited

Post flair is now mandatory, and can also be edited

PLEASE, NO WEIRD, CODED, OR ILLEGAL STUFF IN THE FLAIRS, OR THIS OPTION WILL BE REVOKED. THANK YOU

Other than that, hope it helps makes your search on here more targeted, and hopefully more successful

User flair is optional, and can be edited

Post flair is now mandatory, and can also be edited

PLEASE, NO WEIRD, CODED, OR ILLEGAL STUFF IN THE FLAIRS, OR THIS OPTION WILL BE REVOKED. THANK YOU

Other than that, hope it helps makes your search on here more targeted, and hopefully more successful

Hello, all

Finally found the time to do some much needed updating of some behind-the-scenes stuff in the sub, to make it a bit more user-friendly for the community. Will try to keep this short

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RULES UPDATED

Karma farming rule updated to include "rate my wife", etc., type posts. Rule about harassment added. Figured it should be self-evident, but...

Users can now more accurately report posts that violate the sub rules

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USER FLAIRS ARE LIVE

These were added a while back, but have now updated them in a couple of ways:

1. To be more inclusive, have taken most of the gendered terminology out. Someone might not necessarily be looking for a cis male or cis female, so the default flairs take that into account. That said...

2. You have the option of editing your flair to more accurately reflect whatever you're looking for. So, for example, if the default is "Hotwife Seeking Couple", you can edit it to "Vixen Seeking Couple". WHEN PROMPTED TO CHOOSE YOUR FLAIR, YOU CAN TYPE IN THE TEXT YOU'RE WANTING BEFORE HITTING "APPLY". You're stuck with the specific color, for now LOL. But you have a bit more ability to express yourself on the sub. Hope some of you use it

PLEASE DON'T ABUSE THIS BY TYPING WEIRD, CODED, OR ILLEGAL SHIT INTO THE FLAIRS. WILL REMOVE THAT ABILITY PROMPTLY IF THIS STARTS HAPPENING

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POSTS FLAIRS NOW REQUIRED

Same as above, removed most of the gendered language to make the default flairs more inclusive. But, before you press "Apply", you have the option of going in to edit the flair to more accurately reflect what you're looking for. As requested in the all caps above, use this power wisely

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SIMILAR SUBREDDITS CAN NOW BE FOUND IN RIGHT SIDEBAR OF SUB

Found your way here, but the hotwife angle isn't quite what you're looking for? There are a few other local personals subs linked in the sidebar that may help you find what you're looking for. We're pretty strict about removing non-relevant posts in here, so please feel free to peruse and see if one of those is a better fit, so you're hopefully more successful in your search

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That's it. Hope this makes the sub a bit more accessible, and your searches on here a bit more targeted and successful. Thanks again for being part of this community. All you law-abiding folks are appreciated; the rest of you are tolerated LOL. But seriously, thanks for making the sub what it is, and hope your time in here has been fruitful

As always, be safe, have fun, and stay kinky