I’ve been dancing for over a year and started selling longer dances. How do you make it over an hour dancing?
Usually I will try to take sexy breaks but some dudes except you to dance the entire time. which is fine but I’m hot sweaty and running out of moves.
I’m a dancer and I’ve met a man at the club. we’ve been texting a lot outside the club and he sends me money when I ask. He comes to the club every couple weeks and spend XXXX on me. He’s married and has never been to a club before we met.
He said he’s developing real feelings for me. I have feelings for him to, we text every day throughout the day. And when we see each other in the club we just talk, cuddle, he gives massages to me etc.
we had a talk today where he expressed that he’s feels the transactional aspect of our relationship makes him doubt the authenticity of our relationship. it’s not because he doesnt want to spend money on me; he’s literally never said no to giving me money and said its not an issue for him.
but he doesn’t want to feel like he’s “paying for a relationship“
From my perspective: He’s decades older than me and married. I do have real feeling for him and enjoy our time together. He makes me feel very cared for, but I would feel taken advantage of if I dated him for free.
I’m not a dummy and counting on the promises of a man I met last month. Their marriage isn’t my business.
Plus he’s often traveling, eating out etc. while I’m pretty frugal. I don’t eat out often, rarely take time off or travel, and don’t spend much. So it’s a lifestyle gap as well.
I told him I would be comfortable meeting him outside the club. he said he wants to take me traveling so we would have to build trust.
If he spends a few thousand with me every month anyways and he said he’s in love with me etc etc. I feel like it would just be easier and less transactional to have an allowance set up. how can I breach this gap?
I would never admit this IRL. it’s actually crazy that this happened to me, I thought I was immune.
i started texting this customer because he was alright to chat with and sends me money whenever I’ve asked. He spends about 1000 on me every time he sees me. He’s a good customer.
but he started texting me every day, all day. And I text him back. He’s married, apparently wants to divorce his wife (I swear I’m not naive lmfao).
Anyways I started bossing him around, making him confess his love and adoration for me. I told him he’s not allowed to get dances With anyone else and we can only meet in the club. and he wants to take me on international trips etc. I’m not planning on changing anything.
but dang why did I low key catch feelings? I hate this. Physically Im not attracted to him at all. He’s older, overweight and nutted his pants during a lapdance. The gag is he comes in VIP just to cuddle with me and massage my feet. He’s very intelligent and funny. But he’s genuinely married like it’s not like we’re going to start dating
but emotionally I get angry if he doesn’t text me back or if other dancers try to talk to him. like wtf. Started talking on the phone here and there. What is happening and how do I keep control of the situation ?
I try to keep control by being mean, telling him what to do and asking him for money daily. obvi this only makes him more in love with me, and I start to relish in being adored.
Im considering having a sugar relationship outside the club. someone snap me out of this.
I got some bad news about my health and I can no longer afford to be broke so I’m locking back in. I need a hefty security savings, my dog to the vet and my car to the shop by the end of summer.
last year I was deeply depressed and it was hard to be motivated to make goals. Now I’m at life or death mode so idgaf
I’ve decided to basically cut alcohol entirely as well, which has made my job a lot easier. The club has been way slower in general which is a known topic at this point, but showing up consistently helps those 90$ nights feel like less of a blow.
have you seen this in your club?
My club has a small dressing room. Yet I’ve been seeing an uptake in women bringing carry on suitcases as their dance bag. There is literally no way to open this bag without blocking people from exiting and entering the room.
One dancer in particular ended up leaving the club. I think she felt a lot of resentment because she would have this big ass suitcase and although she would apologize for getting in the way, it still pissed people off to even see her come in the club. she would take an hours to get ready and during that time no one could comfortably move around her.
half the time they open these bags up and theres barely shit in them too! Some thongs and perfume and make up like god damn lol.
if there was a bigger dressing room I would get it but why bring a big ass obstacle into small ass dressing room.
I’m literally crying. I’ve had friends get fired or quit other jobs but this just hits different. I feel like when you have a stripper bestie you’re just trauma bonded from the shit you’ve gone through together. and it means so much to have someone you love and trust there with you through your shift.
im straight up grieving ugh. I’m still going to work obviously but it’s not going to be the same. At all. I like my other coworkers a lot, but theres no one I’d rather see at the club. She always makes me feel so safe and encouraged even in the worst of nights and was the first friend I made at the club.
has this ever happened to you? I’ve seen other stripper besties get separated but I didn’t realize it sucks so bad. I guess I’m done taking cute pics with someone and dancing out of pure joy and happiness. Please commiserate w me I’m devastated.
Here's what you need to know
None of the dancers are happy to see you at the club
Money is tight and a lot of seasoned dancers are leaving with sub 200$ at an average night. So no one is going to be excited for you or surprised that it’s your first time ever in a strip club. They are irritated not because theyre catty, but because the manager is making hiring decisions regardless of the fact that the dancers are struggling to make money as is and clubs are still at max capacity of dancers.
Don’t be overly eager to make friends
Dancers will tend to be cold to you. If you stick around they will open up. Don’t come in the club trauma dumping and telling your whole story.
No one wants to be the one that was too nice to you and you end up latching onto them the whole night because you don’t know anybody and are anxious.
Most dancers don’t want to talk on the floor or have the open seat next to them occupied by another dancer for very long. Especially if they don’t know you.
Don’t come in your first day asking for tips and advice. Nobody trusts you yet and they and you are their competitors. Why would they put you on to all their game when they don’t even know if you’re mentally stable yet??
If you’re giving extras: fingering, touch dick etc. People will catch on quickly its not a secret. people will see you as fucking up the bag for everyone and will talk shit about you.
Be grown. Even if you’re a teenager, in this environment you are an adult. No one will mother you, and people may take advantage of you. This lifestyle is expensive. Strangers are not entitled to give you rides, alcohol, hits of their vape etc. Generousity between dancers is reciprocal.
If you can withstand that and remain chill, normal and self regulated people will begin to befriend you over time.