u/Bumbelbeany

I've had this deep, constant urge for a long time: the need to feel loved, safe, and close to a mommy. It’s like a fire that sits in my chest and never really dies down. Nothing has managed to make it smaller for more than a short while.

I’ve met multiple doms. I had a real-life girlfriend who was into domination. I’m into humiliation and a lot of the usual stuff that comes with it. I’ve bought plenty of online sessions. I’ve drifted into findom and other kinks along the way. None of it has ever fully satisfied the specific desire for a mommy.

I’ve tried stepping away from porn and other sexual content completely. It doesn’t work for me — the urge just sits there and gets louder. Today it’s especially strong and I feel stuck. It feels like I can’t actually get happy or satisfied while this is always running in the background.

How do you guys handle urges this strong and specific? Has anyone found something that actually helps long-term instead of just temporarily quieting it?

Hey! :)

I’m a 32-year-old German living in Finland. I’m currently in an open relationship — my girlfriend is a lesbian and has an online girlfriend. I’m quite shy and have almost no real experience with femdom. Most of what I’ve done so far has been findom.

I’m looking for a Domme or Mommy who might want to take control of me. I’m very loyal and hope to find someone who wants something long-term. Because I’m shy, I sometimes need a little time to open up.

I want to be honest and admit that I’m probably addicted to porn and spend too much time browsing it on Reddit.

Right now I’m going to a language course, but outside of that I always have time. In my free time I like to game, go to the gym, read books, watch movies and anime, swim, and walk in the forest.

I love being embarrassed,humiliated and insulted. I get shy and try to pretend I don’t like it… but deep down I really do.

I’m also hoping to find someone who wants to improve me as a person and push me to go further in life.

I would be very happy to hear from you if you’re interested.

Thank you for reading.

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I’ve had a femdom kink (getting insulted/degraded by strong women) for a couple of years. Since last year though, when I get really horny I completely lose the ability to think straight and almost always end up paying someone online to do it.

I don’t have a regular Domme or anyone who actually controls me — it’s just impulsive spending when the urge hits.

Does anyone have advice on how to break this cycle / get the mindset under control without just white-knuckling it every time?

Thanks.

My gf ruined me

Post:

I (M) was pretty vanilla when I met my girlfriend. I came out of a long previous relationship and didn’t have much experience beyond regular sex. She slowly introduced me to porn and darker kinks over time.

In the first year I moved to a different country for her and left everything behind. That’s when things started escalating. She told me she was bi and started involving lesbian content. Then she pushed us into an open relationship. In practice it was mostly one-sided — she was constantly talking to other people in her DMs while our sex life kept decreasing. Eventually she started seeing guys as well.

It got to the point where I had to stay in the other room and jerk off while she got fucked in the living room. She had total control over my head. She knew exactly what to say to get a reaction out of me.

After five years we barely have sex anymore. Now she insults me while I jerk off and we chat on phone. She sends me porn and specific fantasies I have to get off to. She told me she does this to all her “submissive pets” — she ruins them so they get addicted to her and can’t get real pleasure from anyone else. That way if they leave, they eventually come back.

In the first year she even broke up with me and made me pay her just so I could get off.

Now I can’t finish normally anymore without being insulted. My self-esteem is completely destroyed and I have massive mommy issues because of all this.

I don’t even know why I’m still here. Just needed to get this out.