u/Key_Ranger7402

I haven't been this angry in so long like omg.

So it's been so slow for me lately. I'm already a survival sex worker and barely skirting by, so I can't really afford for it to be slow. Literally I don't know where I'll be sleeping by the end of the week. But that's a separate beast.

I've seen it here in this subreddit that some girls get a job at the strip club to find clients when it’s slow on the sites and stuff. So I did some deep research on the strip clubs/gentleman's clubs in my city, and decided yesterday that I was gonna go audition for a couple of them until one ended up hiring me.

Basically, I got my makeup done for this, I bought a sexy outfit, and I was on my way to pick up pleaser heels when my (very pushy) civvie friend calls. Stupidly, I pick up the phone.

She asks what I'm up to because she wants to hang out. I honestly tell her that I'm going to audition at the strip clubs (I couldn't think of a lie quick enough, and I didn't think it was a big deal. She's such a free spirit, so I thought she would be accepting of it??? I thought I could trust her??? It's just a fucking strip club. I didn't even tell her I was a full blown SW. Also, I met her just one week ago.)

She freaks out, tells me I don't deserve to be in such an awful energy like a strip club, and demands to know where in the city I am so we can meet up. I'm a spineless loser with no balls whatsoever, so I admit defeat and tell her where I am, and all plans to go to the strip clubs last night were completely thwarted.

For the rest of the night that we are hanging out, she is in this "superhero mode" where she's like, "You don't deserve to live this kind of life, I can try to help you get a normal job," Blah blah blah.

I explain to her ad nauseum that I'm just fine with the way I live my life, and I'm not in the headspace to hunt for a civvie job right now. I couldn't find a fucking job in my field in the first place, interview after interview, and I've gotten literally nothing.

She doesn't wanna hear it. It's like she refuses to accept the fact that I aspire to be a stripper at the moment. She's like, "Just try harder to look for a normal job! This can't be your destiny!"

Mind you, like I said, I met her one fucking week ago. Why all the theaterics and overprotection over me???

Now I'm awake early in the morning just seething over this. Like I really should have just went to the strip club last night. That decision was kinda taken from me and I feel so useless. Like I'm deadass gonna be homeless kinda soon. I can just go tonight, but that's not the point really. Every productive day counts when you're unsure where you're gonna be sleeping in a couple days.

I have such a large issue with setting strong boundaries and standing up for myself and shit. Which has definitely bled into my life as a sex worker a couple times. I know I need to work on it, but one thing at a time. I've spent all this morning looking up homeless shelters to stay in, and that's all I can think about right now.

(ALSO!!! We ended up taking a look around at the one of the strip clubs I was GONNA audition at, and I think she was on purpose trying to mess things up for me, trying to "protect me"??? She was doing embarrassing ass things, like ARGUING WITH THE STRIP CLUB STAFF???? Like way to fuck up my chances here in the future!!! It's one of the only strip clubs in my area that actually hires black women, but whatever!!!!)

This was a long rant just to say that I hate my fucking life 😩😩

I just moved to NYC from Minneapolis, Minnesota (I HATE THAT FUCKING CITY).

When I was in Minneapolis, none of the gentlemen's clubs/strip clubs wanted to hire black women, except one shitty hole in the wall strip club where the men were disgustingly cheap. I auditioned there and that was one and only time I ever danced as a stripper.

I always knew I would try stripping again once I left that hellhole city. So I'm here in New York, and I really want to try again.

I'm quite traumatized from my experience going from club to club just to be denied because of my skin color, and I don't know if NYC operates in the same fashion. I'm willing to go to all 5 boroughs to audition at literally any club.

I'm 5'3, 145 pounds, big boobs, flat tummy, and a pretty good sized butt. I know that I'm gorgeous, but some of these clubs just won't recognize that 🙄

And I know I would fit so much better in gentlemen's clubs rather than urban clubs. But at this point, I'm willing to get into any club (that isn't low vibrational as hell).

Any suggestions?!?! Lol 😆

I just moved to NYC from Minneapolis, Minnesota (I HATE THAT FUCKING CITY).

When I was in Minneapolis, none of the gentlemen's clubs/strip clubs wanted to hire black women, except one shitty hole in the wall strip club where the men were disgustingly cheap. I auditioned there and that was one and only time I ever danced as a stripper.

I always knew I would try stripping again once I left that hellhole city. So I'm here in New York, and I really want to try again.

I'm quite traumatized from my experience going from club to club just to be denied because of my skin color, and I don't know if NYC operates in the same fashion. I'm willing to go to all 5 boroughs to audition at literally any club.

I'm 5'3, 145 pounds, big boobs, flat tummy, and a pretty good sized butt. I know that I'm gorgeous, but some of these clubs just won't recognize that 🙄

And I know I would fit so much better in gentlemen's clubs rather than urban clubs. But at this point, I'm willing to get into any club (that isn't low vibrational as hell).

Any suggestions?!?! Lol 😆

I'm really grateful for sex work, I am. The money I've made has gotten me out of a lot of bad financial situations. It's the most money I've ever made.

But I still feel disgusting and worthless. I just met with a client today that said he was really interested in me and wanted to date me. I told him repeatedly that I don't do relationships. And he was like, "Don't worry, you'll warm up to the idea of us dating." Like.... no. I don't do relationships. And he was just such an odd person in general. Like ugh.

I'm tired of my boundaries being pushed every day.
I'm tired of being stressed about my safety every day.
I'm tired of having sex with guys that I would never be interested in otherwise.
I'm tired of being ashamed of myself.
I'm tired of constantly lying to my friends + my family about my whereabouts and my lifestyle.

It's all exhausting.

It makes me wish that I had a normal job so bad. A normal profession that pays me enough to live a happy life, that I can be honest about.

One of my close friends has a job as a high school teacher, and she's so happy with her job and the salary they pay her. She lives in a nice apartment in the suburbs. I tried not to cry in her face when I went to visit her, because boy... I fucking wish.

I'm too mentally ill to keep any job. Or to finish college (dropped out 3 times). And I feel like it's such a cop out, such a lame excuse, but it's literally true. I have a SLEW of mental illnesses. I'm very far from a normal person.

I'm based in the US, but I come from an immigrant family that believes in pushing through anything, regardless if you're mentally ill or not. My culture doesn't even acknowledge mental illness. Like, "Who cares? You need to go to medical school and become a doctor anyways. No one cares about your borderline personality disorder."

My biggest dream was to be a lawyer. But I have never finished a single college class, let alone 4 years of undergrad plus 3 years of law school. I can't even hold down a job at Amazon or Walmart (I've tried).

So... I guess I'll stick with sex work for now.

Does anyone else feel worthless and disgusting while doing this kind of profession? When does this feeling go away???

I'm simply not able to get clients to pre-book in advance and pay a deposit, so I operate on same day appointments. I like to call myself an "available now" provider.

I'm typically not available past 9pm, but I'm starting to think I need to be available throughout the late hours of the night... it seems like no one is interested in seeing me during the daytime hours.

So for my "available now" providers, what time of the day do you get clients texting you the most? I'm trying to see something, lol.

I'm really wanting to move out of FS work and shift to providing full body sensual massages. Tryst has been a complete bust for me, I've tried advertising on there and it's like no one reaches out, even though I get lots of impressions. I don't know if it's that my pictures aren't very "polished" looking, or that I don't have much social proof (I don't have Twitter, Onlyfans, Bluesky, or a website... although I'm currently working on the website).

Anyways, I've tried posting on Craigslist but my ad keeps getting taken down and they've blocked all my emails I keep making, AND my cards, no matter how discreet I am. Ugh I hate Craigslist.

Anyways, I don't really know where else I should try. Any tips or advice? I would really appreciate it. ❤️

So I've switched from scheduling bookings in advance, to same day incall appointments. I was tired of dealing with men that refused to pay a deposit, even if it was just fucking $20.

So with switching to same day incall appointments, I thought that there would be no need for a deposit if they are coming to my hotel room within like an hour or so of responding to my ad. I mean, in that case, why would they flake then? RIGHT??

Person number one said he was gonna be here after work at around 6pm. Never responded again. Then person number two said he was gonna be here around 8pm. Never responded again.

Person number 3 was the most fucking evil. He said he was 20 minutes away, said he was even IN THE HOTEL PARKING LOT, asked for the room number, said he was coming upstairs, and even asked if he should knock when he gets upstairs. I NEVER HEARD A KNOCK. He straight up ghosted me. I don't know if he was ever here in the first place, or if he was just trolling me...

I was getting desperate. I have made no money by this point.

Another guy responded to my ad later in the evening. This was his first time ordering an escort and was VERY. FUCKING. PARANOID. You wouldn't even believe.... I spent 45 whole minutes on the phone with him repeating myself, explaining that I am not a police officer. I told him multiple times that he didn't have to come over if he wasn't comfortable. But he kept going back and forth, like "Uhh.. should I come? I want to trust you... should I not come? I'm not sure... I'm scared." FOR 45 FUCKING MINUTES. And oh god, screening him was a nightmare!

(Btw, I'm a survival SW. As in I have to accept low offers, disrespectful clients, and straight up nonsense, to be able to get by. Right now, I'm on the verge of homelessness. I have no choice but to accept nonsense like this, if I wanna keep a fucking roof over my head. I wish I didn't have to.)

So, he finally did come see me, and was looking up and down my hotel room for "cameras." He still wouldn't calm down. I ended up servicing him finally, and he left very promptly... seemingly unhappy. Jesus fucking Christ. Whatever, at least I got my money out of him.

The past couple days have been slow for me, and mentally rough. I don't know how you guys do it. I'm still rather new to this, and I'm considering going back into the civvie world and getting a 9-5 job, because I can't take this, lol.

I primarily use Megapersonals/Listcrawler to find my clients.... does the site I post on even matter at this point? Is it my area? I'm from a rather small town, and Tryst is not popular here at all. Ugh, I dunno. I'm just feeling so discouraged.

Hey guys. I live in a rural area, where the nearest mid-sized town is a 1 hour drive, and the nearest major city is over 2 hours away. Luckily I have a car and I drive, but it’s still annoying to drive so far to do anything.

Anyways, I'm waiting on being approved for Skip and Mega, it's taking forever (they aren't too popular in my area in the first place). In the meantime, I tried posting on Craigslist advertising my "personal assistant" or "massage" services in the most discreet way possible, it keeps getting taken down no matter how I put it. I've gotten some clients from Reddit, but it's been few and far in between. I'm looking for any other way to get a consistent stream of clients, but it's hard as fuck.

I'm thinking about just walking up and down the streets of my nearby mid-sized town in a tank top, booty shorts, and pleaser heels.

I'm just worried about police and all the nonsense that comes with it. A young, Black female walking around a sleepy Midwestern town in pleaser heels doesn't seem exactly "innocent". I know this way is not really recommended, but idk what else to do. I need this money like yesterday 😩😩 Who here has experience being a SW in less populated areas?

I cannot freestyle by myself for the life of me lmao. I've been aiming for hotel bars on some weekdays (Mon-Thurs) because I know that at hotel bars, there are business travelers and corporate men that are staying in town temporarily. Maybe I should expand my horizons? Lol.

I've had success in talking to men, and I love having conversations with strangers. But for some reason, I can't find it in me to let guys know that my time isn't exactly free. It feels kinda awkward.

Anyways, who's in the Minneapolis area and wants to go freestyling with me sometime this week? I would love to do it with someone 😆

I'm stuck on whether I should do deposits or not. Today I showed up to an outcall and was completely stood up. I don't get it. He said he booked the hotel at the Springhill Suites, and I confirmed the time with him multiple times. He said this was his first time hiring a SW, and he seemed quite excited. I just don't understand going to all these lengths just to ghost.

This just really upset me because I already live in a rural area and have to drive quite far to get to any hotel, and I really needed the money. But I'm brand new to SW and I have no reputation or reviews; because of this, I know clients would be reluctant to send a deposit, and I really can't afford to not have clients at all.

I'm genuinely looking for advice. How did you guys navigate this when you first started out? Do I just keep allowing clients to play me until I gain some credibility, or do I start charging deposits and accept that I won't have many clients?

I'm quite brand new to doing SW, and I've been having some luck getting some clients (over Reddit of all places!)

I've been looking into doing freestyling at my local hotel bars, and I decided that today I was just gonna rip the bandaid off and just do it. Scared money doesn't make money, as they say.

It was a TINY BAR. The bartender is easily able to hear any conversation I have. So already I'm feeling really awkward doing this.

I strike up conversation with the guy on my right (he is dressed as if he is coming from a business conference), asking what he's drinking. He tells me it's a French 75, and doesn't seem interested in engaging in conversation any further. So I sit there awkwardly for another 15 minutes.

So, I have paid my tab and was about to leave to go to another bar, when the same guy (all of a sudden) asks me what I'm drinking, and strikes up conversation with me. In my head, I'm like "Bruuuhhh."

So I ask him if he's here traveling, and he says yes. And then HERE'S THE KICKER: he mentions that he is from my hometown. And that is a reallyyyy sensitive spot for me.

Ever since I moved to the Midwest 9 months ago due to family issues, I've been missing my hometown in Virginia GREATLY. Like, literally every single day. What are the chances that I meet someone in the middle of nowhere Wisconsin that is exactly from where I am from?!

So we chat a lot about that, for another 5 minutes. I was so happy to talk about this subject, and I could tell he's definitely showing interest in me. But for some reason... I couldn’t muster up the courage to suggest that I'm providing services, and that my time isn't exactly free. It was the weirdest mental block, it’s like I couldn't mention it. Maybe it was because I'm honestly embarrassed to be doing this in the first place. Maybe because it was a tiny intimate bar and I was paranoid about people hearing my conversation. I'm not really sure what it was, but I fumbled really badly.

So, I paid my tab and told him it was very nice to meet him, we asked for each other's names... and I left. I was too chicken.

Immediately after leaving, I felt like actual literal shit. Like I had a whole mental breakdown in my car, screaming, honking the horn, kicking the steering wheel, the whole nine.

I've been under SO MUCH STRESS lately, especially involving my (awful) family and my finances. Like I've never been so miserable. I meet an attractive business professional that shares a mutual interest with me, and I'm too pussy to mention that I'm a sex worker. Biggest fumble ever, fucking amazing.

I'm not sure if this line of work is even for me in the first place, but I have very few other options. Where I live is a shitty rural area, and jobs here are quite scarce. Nothing here pays as much as sex work does.

I feel like the biggest idiot in the world. I'm worried that I'll never save up enough money to move back home to Virginia. I just needed to rant honestly... any advice on how to navigate this? I feel like I need more confidence maybe. Ugh I don't know.