u/MassageBySummer

I get this question in my DM’s several times a day from newbie clients:

“How do I find a provider in my city?”

They tell me of their frustrations trying to navigate Tryst and other directory sites, with horror stories of fake profiles, deposit scammers, and OnlyFans models who won’t meet them in person. Throw AI into the mix and they can’t even tell who is an actual human anymore.

With X, FB, and Instagram cracking down on SW it’s getting more difficult to find us on those platforms too.

This might seem like an obvious solution, but sometimes the most obvious solution is the one that gets too often overlooked.

Google is your friend, my dudes.

The best way to find a real human, local companion in your city is to search the web!

For example, when I type in “FBSM sensual massage Oklahoma City,” my official website pops up ranked first in search results.

Providers who are professional and serious have websites, and we know how to do SEO to help you find us in a web search.

Your chances of finding a reliable companion are MUCH better simply searching Google (or your search engine of choice) than wasting your time endlessly scrolling on Tryst, hoping to find someone local, honest, and real.

Of course Google will also bring up escort directory websites in your search results. Avoid those! Most are rabbit holes leading you nowhere.

Look for an actual companion’s official website.

From my own client analytics, 80% of new client inquiries I get come directly from my website, which the client ran across in a Google search.

Only about 10% of my business actually comes through Tryst. The other 10% usually find me on Reddit, BlueSky, Velvet22, or other sites.

Clients, try the simplest solution: Google it!

Providers, don’t sleep on having an official website. Hire a good designer who is an SEO pro. Trust me, it’s worth the investment!

When a client arrives at our incall and asks this question it immediately makes us feel nervous and afraid, wondering “oh shit, is this dude an axe murderer?”

I’ve heard stories of providers terminating the session right then and there, just because this uncomfortable question was asked.

I understand, and I don’t like that question either.

On the other hand, remember that clients also have good reasons to fear for their safety.

Allow me to share a story from my own experience with a terrified new client.

Really nice young Asian guy, very polite, passed screening flawlessly, but he was super nervous when he entered my incall. “Are we… alone?”

He was glancing around, scoping the exits and doors visually, so I said “yes, why do you ask?”

He explained that he once had been robbed and beaten at a hotel incall with a massage girl after answering her ad on Backpage.

She got him naked and lying down on the bed, said she needed to use the bathroom — and then 3 big dudes emerged from the bathroom, took his wallet, phone, & car! Beat the shit out of him and left him with only his clothes. Poor guy.

He said it took him 4 years to summon the courage to see a sex worker again. I felt so bad for him that I did something I don’t normally do.

I walked him through my incall apartment, opening closets, bedroom & bathroom doors to show him that no one was hiding in there, waiting to ambush him.

That really helped to set his mind at ease. After he felt comfortable we had a great session! He tipped me very well and is still a regular client today. Been seeing him for 6 years now!

Not every guy who asks this question is planning to harm you. Sometimes they are afraid you might harm them.

You just have to listen to your gut, screen well, and handle this question on a case by case basis… as you see fit.

These are stressful times. Taking a break — even for an hour or two — is good for your mental and physical health.

Treat yourself to the ultimate pampering experience: a full body sensual massage 💆🏻‍♂️.

I have 10 years experience as a FBSM provider, and more than 15 years in medical massage therapy. You’re in good hands 🙌!

Long blonde hair, blue eyes, athletic/slim build, 5’5”, 120 lbs, 34C-26-37.

Incall located in NW OKC. Shower available.

Outcall within a 30 mile radius.

Offering a wide range of modalities:

FBSM

Bondassage

CannaMassage

Hawaiian Lomi Lomi massage

Japanese Ashiatsu (barefoot) massage

Couples Massage

Fetish friendly

420 friendly

405-367-3966 📱

TEXT ME(no calls)

Visit my Reddit profile for NEW pics, links to my website/socials, and follow me for updates!

Today out of the blue I received a lovely surprise from a client I saw over the weekend: a generous extra tip sent electronically. 💗 💵 (the client had already tipped me well in person at the appointment so I wasn’t expecting this gift.)

I always love it when a client does this a few days after a great visit. It tells me that I gave them a pleasant memory and they’re still thinking of me. Just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. 🥰

Companions, what’s your favorite way of receiving thanks after a session?

Clients, what’s your preferred way of expressing gratitude to a provider you really enjoyed?

These are stressful times. Taking a break — even for an hour or two — is good for your mental and physical health.

Treat yourself to the ultimate pampering experience: a full body sensual massage 💆🏻‍♂️.

I have 10 years experience as a FBSM provider, and more than 15 years in medical massage therapy. You’re in good hands 🙌!

Long blonde hair, blue eyes, athletic/slim build, 5’5”, 120 lbs, 34C-26-37.

Incall located in NW OKC. Shower available.

Outcall within a 30 mile radius.

Offering a wide range of modalities:

FBSM

Bondassage

CannaMassage

Hawaiian Lomi Lomi massage

Japanese Ashiatsu (barefoot) massage

Couples Massage

Fetish friendly

420 friendly

405-367-3966 📱

TEXT ME(no calls)

Visit my Reddit profile for NEW pics, links to my website/socials, and follow me for updates!

Could use a little advice on how to handle a dilemma with a longtime good client.

Been seeing this gent for about 4 years, never had any issues with him until now.

He travels for his job, and he works with contractors who put him up in 5-star resort hotels all over the world, on the company’s dime. Since he doesn’t pay the bill I think he’s pretty out of touch with the rising costs of hotels, especially in this inflation economy where hotels are up 20% or more.

I host incall at a nice hotel and my room rate has increased 20% in the last 2 months. I haven’t raised my prices (yet) so it’s definitely eating into my profit margin. I’ve had to adjust my hotel bookings downward a bit from a 4-star to a 3-star hotel, to make it profitable for me while keeping the rate affordable for the client.

When I sent my client the hotel address 2 hours prior to our appointment this time, he said “great! See you soon!”

I got busy setting up the massage studio in the room, showered, got dressed & gussied up, then he texts me 45 minutes prior to our start time saying “I’m gonna cancel, sorry. Not comfortable with your incall hotel.”

I assured him that I’ve used this particular hotel before and although it’s a 3-star, it’s in a nice neighborhood next to a golf course with premium restaurants on both sides. It’s clean, has good management, no sketchy guests, security cameras, and the parking lot is totally safe. Cars never get broken into, no issues here whatsoever. My clients and I always feel safe. Obviously I would never put myself or my clients in a place that is dirty, sketchy or dangerous.

Despite my invitation for him to show up for our scheduled appointment and see for himself that the hotel is fine, he still declined.

I know he’s kind of spoiled by always having the luxury 5-star experience at hotels and doesn’t want to stay anywhere else. Bit of a hotel snob, and that’s fine. However I rented the room just for him and got stuck paying for it because he didn’t cancel until the last minute after I had checked in, was already set up and ready. Assuming he googled the hotel address, saw it was a 3-star, and noped out because it didn’t meet his standards of excellence.

He explained that he was just spooked by anything less than a luxury hotel. While I was disappointed and pretty upset about the last minute cancellation, he did at least pay me half of the appointment fee for my trouble.

He’s always wanted incall appointments, so I explained to him the facts of life in this inflation economy and that I really can’t afford to host him in a 5-star hotel while keeping the rate he’s used to paying for massage affordable.

Here’s my dilemma: typically a last minute cancellation (without 24 hours notice, as per my usual cancellation policy) results in a black listing of that client. If they inconvenience me like that — without a damn good reason such as illness or a bonafide emergency, I don’t see them again. Even had to fire good regulars for this in the past.

He’s always been a reliable client, I like him, and we have a history together over several years. Do you think I should give him another chance? He indicated that he wants to keep seeing me, and that he will book outcalls in the future at a hotel of his choosing where he feels comfortable.

I’m still feeling pretty disrespected, tbh. He’s the only client who has ever complained about my hotel incall, which suits my other clients just fine. And the last minute no-show really peeves me. Not sure if I can get over it.

What would you do? Any advice for me? Thanks.

Clients, I understand your dilemma in trying to separate the scammers from legit providers. It’s a jungle out there.

That being said, I’d like to stress that all legitimate service providers— from hotels to car rental companies to salons/spas to escorts do require deposits nowadays, because so many clients flake out and skip without paying their bill.

I’ve been a licensed massage therapist for 16 years (10 doing FBSM as a side hustle), and every salon and medical office I’ve ever worked at required a credit card on file at the time of booking. If the receptionist goofed and forgot to get a credit card, and the client ghosted, WE were penalized from our paycheck for the missed appointments.

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t our fault, or our mistake. But we are the ones who always got hosed.

Case in point:

https://www.reddit.com/r/massage/s/7JhJvOS9L7

As for my side gig doing FBSM, I don’t take a credit card number prior to a booking but always required an advance deposit to protect myself against no-shows. It’s never been a problem for serious clients, and those are the only ones I wish to see.

Please don’t ask us to budge on this.

Even if you’re a repeat customer, most of us are still going to require a deposit for every appointment. Trust takes time to establish.

The only time we waive a deposit is if we have been seeing you regularly for YEARS. One or two visits does not make you a regular, nor does it imply that we trust you. You might be surprised how many regular clients ghost us after booking an appointment and take advantage of the trust we extended to them.

It’s a hard lesson learned for many of us. We need only make that mistake once to never make it again.

Thank you for understanding our point of view.

We understand yours too.

We love our GOOD clients and thank you for your business!