u/TheQuietCouncilman

I guess trigger warning; descriptive but it’s spoilered. Wish this sub had some flairs to use like “venting”.

It’s interesting to me how some anal fixated people don’t seem to understand compromise and limits. I was chatting with a woman who has an anal kink. She was up front about it so I compromised when we chatted about the details. I was willing to describe and talk about most anal things - things that I wasn’t interested in but knew she’d really like - but she abruptly got upset when I wasn’t interested in >!rimming her asshole while she farted and making me sniff it!<. I’m not even kidding. Like I understand kink but there has to be some kind of compromise for each persons comfort level. She dropped the chat moments later because I said that’s not something I’d be interested in doing.

I’ve had some success chatting with bisexual women and men in DMs but it seems like people just suddenly delete their accounts without a polite goodbye. It usually happens after a few weeks of good sexting and pics, maybe they just get their fill?

Obviously this isn’t specific to being bi but this is the community I prefer to chat with and I’m more comfortable asking the question here.

I can’t tell you how many posts I copy and paste this comment into; “Hey man, lots of great advice in the comments here but friendly reminder; sometimes anal just isn’t right for a person. There are many, many sexually fulfilling activities that have nothing to do with anal. “Side” is a valid sexual interest and it’s worth looking into!”

While it can definitely be true I’m just so annoyed at seeing “keep trying, you’ll like it eventually” being hammered at people who are first exploring. All options should be on the table, not just that one.

Anyway, sorry for the rant. Just had to get it off my chest.

Hey fam, I’ve been out as a bisexual guy for around 10 years but I’m new to being perceived (seen) sexually by other men. To be blunt; I’ve never been naked with a man and I don’t know how my penis measures up. I guess I’m a little nervous about it. I recently posted my very first dick pick on a bisexual related sub and received some nice replies but I can’t tell if those are just bots and the feral masses.

Are there any specific subreddits (besides the main ones) where a guy could get honest feedback on their penis?

Before we begin I need to preface; I don’t blame my wife and I definitely don’t hate her. This isn’t something she’s choosing and not something she’s “doing to me”. My wife is brilliant, kind, and an amazing mother to our sons. I’ve seen some hateful things people say on certain subs and this isn’t that kind of post or relationship.

Unfortunately over the last 10 years her libido has plummeted to zero, she rarely feels any sexual desire (we’ve been intimate 5 times in the last 2 years) and we can go months without any physical contact at all (not even hugs). She’s had her hormone levels tested and all is normal, she just doesn’t feel any sexual drive. I’m a sensual person and touch is my “love language” as they say. I could spend a week doing nothing but pleasing her sexually and I’d still want more.

Over these lonely, sexless years I’ve taken the time to unpack a lot of things that I repressed. I grew up in a conservative place where same sex attraction wasn’t only considered wrong but it was dangerous. In all honestly, I’ve always known to some degree but didn’t allow myself to acknowledge it. Once I had my “ah ha” moment it felt like a wave of relief washed over me, something I’d held at bay like a weight was gone.

In true awesome wife fashion she accepted it immediately when I told her; she told me it was great I found that piece of myself and bought me a bisexual pride sticker for my gym water bottle. She’s been great, we had a blast watching Heated Rivalry together.

But this is where the struggle bus roles in; I want to have a sexual life while also supporting my best friend. I am going to talk to her and tell her how pent up and frustrated I am and hope to find some compromise where I can have experiences outside of our marriage.

So (if you’re still with me after all of this) has anyone successfully navigated this kind of discussion? If so, how did you approach it? Tips are welcome.