r/RealHookupAdvice

My friend is a client who has been seeing escorts occasionally and he says that he used to never get asked for extra money from a escort but that over the last year that this has occurred more often than not.

Something like a random text message that says like

"Hey sweetie, hope your not working to hard. My **insert emergency situation** and I need some help can you send me **50$** so I can take care of it? Thanks"

My friend says that he hates this especially when it's from a provider that he enjoys. He hates it because he feels like when he doesn't send the situation changes and it gets awarded at the min if he doesn't pay. And when he does he also notices a decline in the sexual energy on her part and when they are together that energy is replaced with a "needy" energy and everything becomes itemized transactions the micro purchases in video games. All of a sudden the escort has a emergency every week and every thing has a price when the escort talks.

I told him to set boundaries on the 1st date but he thinks it makes him sound like a jerk to say that upfront.

Personally, I think giving gifts is more fun for both when the gift isn't asked for. Like if the connection is cool, which is what clients want when things are good, than the gifts come and money just flow freely from my side. But that flow gets stuck in the pipeline when a provider asks for gifts/money first. The fun and joy and discovery clog up the pipe. Makes it difficult to get hard and blocks the money from leaving bank accounts.

Especially if the connection was trash or the escort underperformed or the experience was not up to standard.

Would anyone, client or companion care to share some thoughts or provide some insight?

Clients has this happened to you? How did you handle it?

Companions do ask your clients for extra money outside of a date. Do you ever payback the client?

I’ve been asked this by multiple guys, I always mention to them how it is mostly a porn thing and I’ve tried in which it hasn’t worked ever. Is there any actual way to do this or no because I think the answer is no. My throat is like closed at that angle.

Edit: Thank you for the advice and your experiences!! I appreciate it a ton, feel free to keep messaging

Having a vasectomy is great. Not worrying about getting anyone pregnant, and my partner not needing to be on any sort of intrusive birth control are the best. Not needing to use condoms with regular partners is the icing on the cake.

Here is the dilemma. Current gf has been having a smell issue presumably due to the frequent ejaculations inside of her. The smell is noticable and occasionally rather potent, but not foul or offputting (to me). She doesn't like it.

Aside from not coming inside, which is admittedly a drag, what can we do to mitigate this problem? I have read of probiotics and acid treatments that she can take, but I am also interested in anything I can do on my end. I eat well, am properly hydrated, and am in excellent fitnes and health, so "drink more water" and "exercise more" are not particularly helpful solutions.

Any ideas? I'm actively researching the issue but I'm hoping that someone has already figured this out.

So im F19 and the title kind of speaks for itself. When I have sex with a guy I’m dating for the first time it’s amazing and I’m actually horny. Everytime after that when a guy initiates sex, foreplay doesn’t turn me on the same way. I feel bad because I do actually like the guy I’m seeing and I want to be turned on as well. I’m not sure what to do or if this is normal.

Hey guys so I'm in my early 30s and I've pinpointed several aspects that affect the sex life of me and my gf. Any advice on any of these issues would be wonderful.

1. I don't stay hard for very long without stimulation

• If I'm jacking off, I can stay hard for maybe 30-60 mins. But that's with constant jacking and watching porn.

2. I'm not used to the rhythmic thrusts that are used to penetrate (as seen in pornography)

• Are there any hip exercises I can practice to make my lumbar region more flexible for penetration?
• Is it just me, or am I just not that flexible?

3. I'm about a foot taller than my gf

• It affects the "angle of attack" so when we're on the bed, I can't get in a comfortable position to penetrate
• I prefer my penis to angle down more (parallel with my thighs) even during masturbation, is there any position that helps with this? Some positions like spooning don't work.
• It also affects how long I stay hard, as shifting positions for a long time, to try to find the optimal position to penetrate, makes me go limp (maybe also affects my confidence?)
• Pillows in my opinion don't help too much because they're soft, and we're right back in the suboptimal position after a few tries.

4. Physical attraction aspect

• I find my gf very cute, especially with makeup on. but without makeup (also she doesn't have big breasts), she looks very young and I'm not into...you know what.
• This issue has improved with her putting make up on before we do the deed.
• But watching porn and jacking off at least daily reduces my sensitivity to girls I normally encounter in my daily life.
• I understand this issue also affects point #1. But I think NOT watching porn isn't a viable solution because it also serves as a stress reliever. I don't live with my gf so we can't have sex every day.

I'd like to ask if these problems are encountered on a regular basis by people in general.

Apart from sex, I think we are very compatible. At my age and in my country and situation, it's difficult to find someone else so I'd prefer not to break up with her.

TL;DR:

• I'm much taller than my gf, I'm not used to the rhythmic thrusting for penetration, and the "angle of attack" is an issue
• I'd like to know if there are any hip exercises to improve penetration?
• Are there sex positions that help with a more downward pointing penis (parallel with my thighs)?

Thank you again and all advice are greatly appreciated!!

Me [26M] and my girlfriend [25F] got invited to a foursome by a couple we're friends with [30F + 32M].

This was an absolute surprise for both of us. We talked about this kind of scenario in the past but never thought this might become reality anyway so we never approached them about it. It turns out they were the first to start the convo.

We talked about this between us and we agreed we want to do it because we trust them about it. They're pretty open with their sex life and has been swinging before.

We know about consent, talk about preferences and boundaries. Is there anything else we need to bring up and discuss? Any dos and don'ts that we're forgetting?

Anyone with experience, help.

EDIT: We agreed on the no swapping rule. It'll only be a parallel play with some minor interactions.

Had a one-off/one night stand situation recently and I pulled out a little packet of lube. He goes, “Oh, I’ve never used lube before.”

He genuinely didn’t make me feel weird about it at all, so this is probably me overthinking, but I’m curious — would a guy ever judge a girl for bringing her own lube?

Like is there a stigma I’m not aware of or is it more just… great, better sex?

I’m kinda on a journey of figuring out what I actually enjoy sexually instead of just doing whatever I think a guy wants, so I’m trying to get more comfortable asking for/using things that make sex better.

Also: does lube make a big difference sensation-wise for guys? Because he kept saying I felt really good, was very clearly trying not to cum too fast, and then came pretty quickly lol. Could the lube have played a part or was he probably just really turned on?
Genuinely curious what men think.

I (21F) don’t want to sound ungrateful about how long my bf (25M) takes to finish during sex, but it gets to a certain point..
He lasts way too long and at some point his body gets too exhausted I have to get on top to get him off or just finish off with a hand job

We start off with me being wet and horny but the duration of the session eventually turns me dry and it starts feeling like a chore to get him to cum

I read posts similar to my problem and many comments were suggesting “communication “..
What does that even mean? I can’t ask him to cum faster, that would only make him anxious and it isn’t like he can control it???

Hey all, for the people how do a lot of hookups how not to get attached what’s the trick?

I'm hooking up with a guy who is obsessed with the blowjobs I give. However, my dirty talk ain't that great. I've recently found out he has a praise kink and I want to make the experience even better for him but have no idea where to start.

We're not in a relationship or anything so I'm cautious I don't want to say anything too lovey dovey lol

i 23f have a hard time expressing what i want during sex with men. i’m not really looking for a relationship and pretty frequently have (protected) flings here and there. with women it’s so much easier for me but with men it’s hard for me to voice that i want my pussy ate. sex comes so naturally to me and i usually don’t even feel anxious during it but unless they initiate eating me out or ask me what i want them to do to me which i tell them i want some head and i get it it usually doesn’t happen. i feel like men should automatically want to eat you out and i always feel awkward demanding/asking for it.. its so weird to me because with women you never have to ask it’s just a given but most men don’t really feel that way. also i can’t imagine telling a man to go down on me to which they respond “no” or “they don’t do that” because where do you even go from there?? i guess i’d have to kick them out or give them the same energy and refuse giving them head.😭 at the end of the day i know i need to be more assertive and it’s something im working on because i deserve to have my needs met just as much as they do. what i want to know is how yall go about saying you want some head? or how do you signal to it?