u/Humane-Dust-Mover

After 9.1k views in a week, we have results!

686 votes (7.5% of views)
239 (35%) identify as Male
391 (57%) identify as Female
56 (8%) identify as Non-Binary

This means that a bit over a third of users are men, with women dominating (pun intended) the men by 1.6x!

Obviously, I did not ask about trans identities or things of that nature. Similarly, I’m not sure if views are individual views or it counts duplicates (eg I’ve seen this poll 10 times, is that one view for one user or ten views?). Assuming it’s pure views, this in theory could represent a significant portion of users.

There are caveats like people who only use this community as porn or to sext are less likely to respond. Especially if we include accounts created for a day or two and then delete, or even views from users not signed in. My hypothesis is that those non-voting users skew male. Because of that, results should be taken with a grain of salt.

(Original Poll: https://www.reddit.com/r/softmaledom/s/giTASbK2Pe)

Everyone has a different reason for ending up here. Some people just lost the spark in the relationship. Others are bored and need variety. Still others are in a situation where they can’t leave yet, and this is there escape.

But moi? I don’t fit so neatly in those buckets.

I married my best friend. She’s seriously the best. But over the years, she’s slowly come to the realisation that she’s asexual.

We’ve tried it all. I’m a hopeless romantic, so I take her out on dates even when my bank account disagrees. I bring chocolates and flowers. I give her all the massages. We went to couples counselling. Then a sex therapist.

But nothing.

So I turned to Reddit. Hoping to figure out what I want. It’s not like I can download Tinder. After all, I don’t want to leave my best friend. But the bed feels lonely, and I don’t know who to turn to.

So tell me: why are you here?

****

PS This is a kink account, and I make a lot of posts and comments in character. I promise I’m not a creep or misogynist lol

After seeing a post about members (https://www.reddit.com/r/softmaledom/s/4Hv8Gr6nK0) I thought a poll would be nice to get an idea of who’s here.

For now, I’m just going with gender expressions. Trans women are women, trans men are men. Third option for enby and the like. Simple stuff.

View Poll

Before getting into this:

Read the subreddit you’re on. Read the rules. If you’re a misandrist or anti-porn, get out of here. Seriously, let us enjoy our corner of the internet in peace.

With that being said…

********

As a man, I’ve seen many a post on a few subreddits that make me wonder if women understand what is the point of a patriarchal relationship. So I’ve decided to address a question that comes up again and again in these communities:

What do men want/How do I please my man?

The answer is simple: ask your man.

If you’re committed to someone and engaging in this dynamic, you have to understand the fundamental underpinning of the relationship: the man is Dominant and the woman is submissive. In other words, the man leads and the woman follows.

If at any point you’re wondering how to make your man feel more like a king, you need to ask him. It doesn’t matter what the internet says. If your man is your patriarch, then your man has final say (barring limits and dangerous situations, of course). If you’re asking us “how can I look hotter”, you’re gonna get a myriad of answers. But there is only one that truly matters: his.

If you’re not committed, then the questions are understandable. But just know that anything you do is in service of men. And the decisions you make affect who you attract. For example, working to get stick thin (apparently heroin chic is making a comeback) will attract some men but completely repulse others. Same with plastic surgery. Be mindful of these things when working on your body.

In short, this lifestyle requires women who devote themselves to men. Instead of trying to please all men, focus on pleasing only one. Unless he wants you to please others, of course.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk. (KenTalk?)