u/ScaryPineapple8511

“I want chocolate and sleep”

to

“I wanna be the kryptonic Achilles heel love of a very smart, socially particular deviant dick who can’t resist me”

Cheers to the monthly follicular reverse-lobotomy.

(Double fucking cheers to being on vacation for the changing of the tides)

Life hack: learn your domme’s facets of the month and either be nice, buy her shit, or shut the fuck up…

Depending on the time of the month, it’s a hell of a ride 🖤

You guys are my fuuuuuucking favorites - my god, how I love the spine

You are the most complex and fun to play with because you just don’t give a fuck and you’re bored little suckers for the unexpected - just like me.

You tend to be intelligent lunatics, addicted to the risk of utter devastation (aka you’re closet freeeeaks who are down to do whatever I say, despite having a very upright image to maintain in society). ✨dichotomy✨

You’re super fun to talk to and you gift the most generously (after pretending like you weren’t already dying to)

Brats who are never free to actually be brats.

I fucking love watching you undo.

You always find your way back for more no matter how much pouting you do - because ultimately…you’re hooked on my authenticity, quiet confidence, and the sliiiight fear of being completely seen right through.

Anyone else get extra horny and devious when on vacation? 😈

I can’t wait to sun these buns and get waited on hand and foot to the sound of the ocean. Fucking bring 👏🏻 it 👏🏻 on.

Something I like to do when I go on trips is really journal and come up with new fantasies and erotica by the pool. When my mind is less occupied with the millions of things I’m responsible for every day, I am in my most deviant form 🤷‍♀️

What’s your fave perv activity (besides the obvious) while you’re away and enjoying?

That’s it. That’s the post.

(Reddit is hiding my shit again. Read my comments & Telegram me *in bio*)

I can only do SPH if I turn it into a joke. Like “look at that wet inchworm on your thigh, trying so very hard to get home” or “awww does Microphallus Mike have something to say?”….I dislike the 🤏🏻 hand gesture because it feels cheap. But I can def have fun if it can be eloquent lol. Also helps if they are actually packin (which I’ve found to be common amongst the men begging me to mock their peshy)

Idk. I just don’t understand it? I generally don’t do a lot of degredation unless it’s clever but what about my fellow dommes? Is it something you do a lot of? Do you love it? Do you hate it ? Discuss 👐🏻

I can only do SPH if I turn it into a joke. Like “look at that wet inchworm on your thigh, trying so very hard to get home” or “awww does Microphallus Mike have something to say?”….I dislike the 🤏🏻 hand gesture because it feels cheap. But I can def have fun if it can be eloquent lol. Also helps if they are actually packin (which I’ve found to be common amongst the men begging me to mock their peshy)

Idk. I just don’t understand it? I generally don’t do a lot of degredation unless it’s clever but what about my fellow dommes? Is it something you do a lot of? Do you love it? Do you hate it ? Discuss 👐🏻

I can only do SPH if I turn it into a joke. Like “look at that wet inchworm on your thigh, trying so very hard to get home” or “awww does Microphallus Mike have something to say?”….I dislike the 🤏🏻 hand gesture because it feels cheap. But I can def have fun if it can be eloquent lol. Also helps if they are actually packin (which I’ve found to be common amongst the men begging me to mock their peshy)

Idk. I just don’t understand it? I generally don’t do a lot of degredation unless it’s clever but what about my fellow dommes? Is it something you do a lot of? Do you love it? Do you hate it ? Discuss 👐🏻

I saw this post that asked what advice we’d give ourselves when we started, if we knew what we know now. Or something like that.

Here are my answers…how about yours?

✅ You do not have to show your butthole to attract great subs

✅ Most subs like playing with pee (big win bc so do I)

✅ You don’t have to be angry at everyone to be taken seriously, but that still doesn’t mean you’re “soft”.

✅ Honorifics are allowed to be cheesy to you.

✅ The more excited you are about weird shit you wanna do, the more fun the subs who come to you will be.

✅ Neurodivergents make the best play partners on either side… being comfy being odd is what makes this so thrilling.

✅ Instagram doms can be helpful but also dumb and problematic - do your own research, make it your own brand, and ignore people who don’t jive with your style. Everyone’s allowed to have preferences.

✅ Make sure you stay firmly planted in reality and remember 9/10 times these are strangers who don’t actually know you or want to know you - they just wanna know what you can do for them and they’ll try to replace you immediately. It’s not personal. Let em go show someone else their pp, you’ll still live and prosper lol

✅ Stop internalizing people like cutting you off. This is a transient space. Be and act as responsible as you can, but realize we’re all strangers. People are going through shit. It’s not always about you.

✅ Ignore downvotes from crusty dusties with too much time on their hands. Just be your weird, perverted self. You’re not doing this to pander to mens’ pleasure or dommes’ approval. You’re not doing this to be liked by people on Reddit you’ll never meet.

✅ HAVE FUN

It could be hot to be doing a domme session on video while I’m painting the patio, ignoring the screen but calling out orders, amounts, and directions.

Something about the contrast of a very normal domestic action and having a clothed perv (I’m into cfnm) over *yonder* on my phone listening to me and tugging it.

Could be hot? My backyard is private so. No risk of neighbors seeing. Hearing, maybe. But not seeing.

(Ps. Again, disclaimer: they aren’t letting me change my settings so my posts aren’t showing up on my profile or allowing messages… but I am a real one who’s been around for a bit lol)

It could be hot to be doing a domme session on video while I’m painting the patio, ignoring the screen but calling out orders, amounts, and directions.

Something about the contrast of a very normal domestic action and having a clothed perv (I’m into cfnm) over *yonder* on my phone listening to me and tugging it.

Could be hot? My backyard is private so. No risk of neighbors seeing. Hearing, maybe. But not seeing.

(Ps. Again, disclaimer: they aren’t letting me change my settings so my posts aren’t showing up on my profile or allowing messages… but I am a real one who’s been around for a bit lol)

It could be hot to be doing a domme session on video while I’m painting the patio, ignoring the screen but calling out orders, amounts, and directions.

Something about the contrast of a very normal domestic action and having a clothed perv (I’m into cfnm) over *yonder* on my phone listening to me and tugging it.

Could be hot? My backyard is private so. No risk of neighbors seeing. Hearing, maybe. But not seeing.

(Ps. Again, disclaimer: they aren’t letting me change my settings so my posts aren’t showing up on my profile or allowing messages… but I am a real one who’s been around for a bit lol)

Posting again bc Reddit isn’t showing my posts on profile anymore 🙄🙄🙄

I want to make a sub my makeover project.

Like an early 2000’s rom-com.

I wanna teach them how to enjoy their money better than they are right now.

I wanna style them based on their features - pick out all their clothes. Get em a new hairstyle. Teach them how to not use the same bar of soap on their face as they do their balls. Teach them about watches 😍

I wanna send em on trips or experiences so they can send me dirty pictures wherever I direct them to

I wanna pick restaurants and dishes at those restaurants for them to try.

They pay for it all and I get the verbal/photographical/social media proof they’re following my instructions. It’d be extra hot for them to tag me in their IG stories and hide the tag so only the two of us know why they’re there and who the fuuuuck sent em 😌

They’re not allowed to say no (within reason, obviously) without trying what I suggest first. They’d have to trust the process.

I typically charge thousands to do this for people in my vanilla day business but I don’t get the kink or fun little add-ons like being worshipped, gifted, and adored (at least, to my knowledge lol)

I don’t want to include degradation - this would be a positive and fun experience.

Thoughts?

Posting again bc Reddit isn’t showing my posts on profile anymore 🙄🙄🙄

I want to make a sub my makeover project.

Like an early 2000’s rom-com.

I wanna teach them how to enjoy their money better than they are right now.

I wanna style them based on their features - pick out all their clothes. Get em a new hairstyle. Teach them how to not use the same bar of soap on their face as they do their balls. Teach them about watches 😍

I wanna send em on trips or experiences so they can send me dirty pictures wherever I direct them to

I wanna pick restaurants and dishes at those restaurants for them to try.

They pay for it all and I get the verbal/photographical/social media proof they’re following my instructions. It’d be extra hot for them to tag me in their IG stories and hide the tag so only the two of us know why they’re there and who the fuuuuck sent em 😌

They’re not allowed to say no (within reason, obviously) without trying what I suggest first. They’d have to trust the process.

I typically charge thousands to do this for people in my vanilla day business but I don’t get the kink or fun little add-ons like being worshipped, gifted, and adored (at least, to my knowledge lol)

I don’t want to include degradation - this would be a positive and fun experience.

Thoughts?

Here is the premise:

I’m going to ask you 21 Questions.

They will ramp up in emotional intensity as we go.

For example:

Fantasy

Forbidden kinks

First experiences

School

Career

Childhood/Parents

Partners, past and present

Failures

There is a $10 fee & punishment task if I feel like you’re lying, holding back, or choose to skip.

This will be done through voice note.

Imagine…I will hear the tremor, the nervousness in your voice, the hesitancy, the fear of getting it wrong combined with the secret desire to be called out and fined a perv task (i’m kinda nuts) & fee.

If you are an open book and brain for me to pick through as I wish and don’t accrue a fee (good luck) - it’s $50 for the experience.

If you have the personality of a cashew and it becomes more mental energy for me to carry this on than I want or if I’m not having fun at any point… it’s $50 and game over anyway. Don’t bore me with simple answers to thoughtful questions. It pisses me off.

I want complex and expressive subs who won’t just bitch out and stay surface.

🧠 ✨ HOW TO GET IN:

Reddit gods have been screwing w me so if you want to do this, you’ll have to telegram me “21 Questions Please” - handle in bio. I’ve been around and doing this forever. I know how shady this looks but I refuse to upload my face or ID into the app, so here we are. Check my comments for presence.

My dream sub, as a psych / dopamine domme:

I’ve been doing this for a while now and have had some fantastic dynamics. As an inconspicuous psychological domme, here is my dream sub:

1. They know the drill.

Discussion before kink. Boundaries, preferences, age verification.. This is so basic, it made me a fucking matcha latte. This isn’t anything groundbreaking.

2. They are a little bratty but not whiney or disrespectful.

I loooooove banter. I love flirting. I’m not personally into the desperate, beg-for-attention ypes (unless you messed up or pissed me off… in that case, you better chase me down and apologize).

3. They enjoy holding a conversation and aren’t afraid to go deep, try to teach me something, or let me teach them something. They’re chatty even though they lead busy lives (not constantly though bc I’m busy too) and consistent in good morning texts. We bullshit about random stuff, easily.

4. They do not try to top from the bottom.

They do not act entitled — especially if they’re gifting or generous — and are generally grateful for our dynamic and my time. They do not only contact me when they have a boner and want it tended to

5. They aren’t afraid to compliment me GENUINELY (not kissing ass constantly with shallow, basic compliments) because that fake, low effort shit really turns me off.

6. They are open to being guided through new things.

I personally love collecting firsts… I want to expand my sub’s world while they trust me (and fund me) to do so.

7. They’re generous because they want to be and they’re HAPPY to be, not because I demand or ask them to be.

I do not ask for “tribute” to talk. I do not need to be a domme for income but I loooove being gifted. I love when subs love to send. Who doesn’t? But they don’t guilt me or go cold right after.

8. Our chemistry is blatant to both of us.

Being their domme feels fulfilling, never cliché. I haaaaate the ordinary and obvious. I love the unexpected. Finding that in a sub is chefs kiss

9. They’re just as perverted and down for anything as I am (within not tooooo many boundaries, ofc).

I love pushing subs. I’ve given some of the craziest tasks before just for my own deviant pleasure and ego. I’m not shy. I’m not demure. I’m not hardcore but that doesn’t mean I’m straightedge either. I loooove a filthy sub who doesn’t even seem dirty irl.

10. They like good music and actually listen to the playlists I tell them to, at the times I think they’d like them best. (I’m a big fan of making playlists for our sessions)

Honestly I can ramble about this for days. I also have high expectations of dommes (as a domme myself) but I’m curious to hear your ultimate favorite sub qualities 😌👇🏻

My dream sub, as a psych / dopamine domme:

I’ve been doing this for a while now and have had some fantastic dynamics. As an inconspicuous psychological domme, here is my dream sub:

1. They know the drill.

Discussion before kink. Boundaries, preferences, age verification.. This is so basic, it made me a fucking matcha latte. This isn’t anything groundbreaking.

2. They are a little bratty but not whiney or disrespectful.

I loooooove banter. I love flirting. I’m not personally into the desperate, beg-for-attention ypes (unless you messed up or pissed me off… in that case, you better chase me down and apologize).

3. They enjoy holding a conversation and aren’t afraid to go deep, try to teach me something, or let me teach them something. They’re chatty even though they lead busy lives (not constantly though bc I’m busy too) and consistent in good morning texts. We bullshit about random stuff, easily.

4. They do not try to top from the bottom.

They do not act entitled — especially if they’re gifting or generous — and are generally grateful for our dynamic and my time. They do not only contact me when they have a boner and want it tended to

5. They aren’t afraid to compliment me GENUINELY (not kissing ass constantly with shallow, basic compliments) because that fake, low effort shit really turns me off.

6. They are open to being guided through new things.

I personally love collecting firsts… I want to expand my sub’s world while they trust me (and fund me) to do so.

7. They’re generous because they want to be and they’re HAPPY to be, not because I demand or ask them to be.

I do not ask for “tribute” to talk. I do not need to be a domme for income but I loooove being gifted. I love when subs love to send. Who doesn’t? But they don’t guilt me or go cold right after.

8. Our chemistry is blatant to both of us.

Being their domme feels fulfilling, never cliché. I haaaaate the ordinary and obvious. I love the unexpected. Finding that in a sub is chefs kiss

9. They’re just as perverted and down for anything as I am (within not tooooo many boundaries, ofc).

I love pushing subs. I’ve given some of the craziest tasks before just for my own deviant pleasure and ego. I’m not shy. I’m not demure. I’m not hardcore but that doesn’t mean I’m straightedge either. I loooove a filthy sub who doesn’t even seem dirty irl.

10. They like good music and actually listen to the playlists I tell them to, at the times I think they’d like them best. (I’m a big fan of making playlists for our sessions)

Honestly I can ramble about this for days. I also have high expectations of dommes (as a domme myself) but I’m curious to hear your ultimate favorite sub qualities 😌👇🏻

My dream sub, as a psych / dopamine domme:

I’ve been doing this for a while now and have had some fantastic dynamics. As an inconspicuous psychological domme, here is my dream sub:

1. They know the drill.

Discussion before kink. Boundaries, preferences, age verification.. This is so basic, it made me a fucking matcha latte. This isn’t anything groundbreaking.

2. They are a little bratty but not whiney or disrespectful.

I loooooove banter. I love flirting. I’m not personally into the desperate, beg-for-attention ypes (unless you messed up or pissed me off… in that case, you better chase me down and apologize).

3. They enjoy holding a conversation and aren’t afraid to go deep, try to teach me something, or let me teach them something. They’re chatty even though they lead busy lives (not constantly though bc I’m busy too) and consistent in good morning texts. We bullshit about random stuff, easily.

4. They do not try to top from the bottom.

They do not act entitled — especially if they’re gifting or generous — and are generally grateful for our dynamic and my time. They do not only contact me when they have a boner and want it tended to

5. They aren’t afraid to compliment me GENUINELY (not kissing ass constantly with shallow, basic compliments) because that fake, low effort shit really turns me off.

6. They are open to being guided through new things.

I personally love collecting firsts… I want to expand my sub’s world while they trust me (and fund me) to do so.

7. They’re generous because they want to be and they’re HAPPY to be, not because I demand or ask them to be.

I do not ask for “tribute” to talk. I do not need to be a domme for income but I loooove being gifted. I love when subs love to send. Who doesn’t? But they don’t guilt me or go cold right after.

8. Our chemistry is blatant to both of us.

Being their domme feels fulfilling, never cliché. I haaaaate the ordinary and obvious. I love the unexpected. Finding that in a sub is chefs kiss

9. They’re just as perverted and down for anything as I am (within not tooooo many boundaries, ofc).

I love pushing subs. I’ve given some of the craziest tasks before just for my own deviant pleasure and ego. I’m not shy. I’m not demure. I’m not hardcore but that doesn’t mean I’m straightedge either. I loooove a filthy sub who doesn’t even seem dirty irl.

10. They like good music and actually listen to the playlists I tell them to, at the times I think they’d like them best. (I’m a big fan of making playlists for our sessions)

Honestly I can ramble about this for days. I also have high expectations of dommes (as a domme myself) but I’m curious to hear your ultimate favorite sub qualities 😌👇🏻

Tell me your choices! Here are mine:

Jacob Elordi - I’d wanna get a running start and jump off a springboard like I’m a Harlem Globetrotter

Dermot Mulroney - this man is in everything so might as well everything in the man.

Joe Rogan - he’s already prepped and knows the best lube for lasting glide.

Jared Leto - I feel like he’d hold still and maintain eye contact, fuckin creep

Chris Petrone on insta/tt - a niche selection.

Russel Brand - I’d name the strap “firework” and exclusively play I Kissed A Girl over and over until he snaps

Sasha Baron Cohen - I’m a sucker for tall and funny. The way he commits to the bit, shows real chutzpah. He’d have to bring his glorious wife with him.

Tom Hardy - he continuously gives mmf

Gavin Newsome - he’s hot, bratty af, and seems very hygienic. There’s a slight JFK kink here but I won’t explain further.

The ensemble cast of the first Magic Mike installment - I’d make them stand in a row, starting with Mcconaughey.

Ethan Slater - weird little SpongeBob dingus

Daniel Radcliffe - I’ve only seen one of the HP movies (the last one. I was drunk on a date and had no idea what the fuck was happening) but I honestly enjoy all his other movies I’ve seen. “You walk a mean dog” (points if you can name the movie). Or that movie where he played a bloated corpse? Fantastic role choices. I know it’d be a 10/10 peggin

Hugh Grant - I just know he’d make me laugh and grumble-gossip with me.

Willem Dafoe - but only if he does the Green Gobblin voice the whole time

James Spader - old Black List Spader, not young Baby Boom Spader. I’d request orchids be present (iykyk)

Hunter Biden - elaborating from yesterday’s post.

Timothee Chalamet - he’s dying for it but I’d have to use extreme vocal fry to help him relax and feel familiar.

I feel like I’m forgetting so many but here’s what I can conjure for now.

Which celebrities would you peg??

Tell me yours!

​

Hunter Biden (see my music post) - hilarious little former crackhead who’d be an absolute blast

​

Anna Wintour - the way I’d have that groundhog lookin’ lady simping, I just know it. And you know she’s prally meticulously tidy (which I appreciate)

​

Frederick Banting - it’s the least I could do, really.

​

Adrian Brody - when you make art like…that…despite winning Oscars, you absolutely have a humiliation kink.

​

Kathy Bates in Misery - I don’t think I can explain this in words, but it works?

​

Ed Sheeran - idk he just has a face I wanna see made very nervous.

​

Tell me your picks!