u/Flashy_Yesterday9664

Never in a million years did I think I’d be making a post like this, actually venting about a sub.
I’ve never been one to noticed the presence of a sub leaving my life.
There were ALWAYS more in line
This one subs though, one of my most prized possessions; and I have NEVER referred to a sub as a prized nor a possession, much less in combination.
He paid me to clean my house.
He didn’t come every month at the same time. Depending on what he had going on in his life, he’d sometimes come weekly, biweekly, & sometimes skip a month, but he came. When he was finished, he’d leave my money on the shelf in my bedroom closet and roll out.
I trusted him. (EXTREMELY rare.)
He had the combination to my door. He had access to my home and my personal space even when I wasn’t there.
I finally understand what ppl mean when they say not to take things for granted!
Like WTH am I supposed to find another one?!
Do they even exists anymore?
Because, apparently;
my standards are a problem.
On a positive note, it has opened my eyes to just how good my life truly is.
I suppose even a f can occasionally be reminded that some possessions are priceless.

But seriously though…
I need another one!!!

I rarely seek outside advice when implementing new protocols for my subs, but this one is an exception…

I understand that the natural instinct of a sub is to apologize; even when they haven’t done anything wrong, but it annoys the shit out of me!! Especially when they’re doing it profusely in the middle of a conversation.

I have this one sub who doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. I tried to count every time he said the words “I’m sorry” during our last conversation, but I stopped at 26. We weren’t even 20 minutes into that call.

I can’t be the only person who feels this way, right?

It means absolutely nothing when someone is apologizing purely out of habit. At that point, the words lose their meaning. The only way for him to break the habit is to become aware of it.

And what better way to create awareness than to enforce an apology tax that requires him to pay a set amount every time he apologizes unnecessarily?

The issue here isn’t whether or not I’m setting an apology tax; because that’s happening.

The real question is determining an amount that will have an actual Impactful.

I feel like if I set it too low, it won’t actually be effective because he genuinely enjoys sending to me. But I also don’t want to set it so high that it becomes unreasonable.

It needs to be an amount that will actually make him pause, recognize the habit, and think twice before those words automatically come out.

What are y’all experiences?

I rarely seek outside advice when implementing new protocols for my subs, but this one is an exception…

I understand that the natural instinct of a sub is to apologize; even when they haven’t done anything wrong, but it annoys the shit out of me!! Especially when they’re doing it profusely in the middle of a conversation.

I have this one sub who doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. I tried to count every time he said the words “I’m sorry” during our last conversation, but I stopped at 26. We weren’t even 20 minutes into that call.

I can’t be the only person who feels this way, right??

It means absolutely nothing when someone is apologizing purely out of habit. At that point, the words lose their meaning. The only way for him to break the habit is to become aware of it.

And what better way to create awareness than to enforce an apology tax that requires him to pay a set amount every time he apologizes unnecessarily?

The issue here isn’t whether or not I’m setting an apology tax; because that’s happening.

The real question is determining an amount that will have an actual Impactful.

I feel like if I set it too low, it won’t actually be effective because he genuinely enjoys sending to me. But I also don’t want to set it so high that it becomes unreasonable.

It needs to be an amount that will actually make him pause, recognize the habit, and think twice before those words automatically come out

What are y’all experiences?

I rarely seek outside advice when implementing new protocols for my subs, but this one is an exception…

I understand that the natural instinct of a sub is to apologize; even when they haven’t done anything wrong, but it annoys the shit out of me!! Especially when they’re doing it profusely in the middle of a conversation.

I have this one sub who doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. I tried to count every time he said the words “I’m sorry” during our last conversation, but I stopped at 26. We weren’t even 20 minutes into that call.

I can’t be the only person who feels this way, right??

It means absolutely nothing when someone is apologizing purely out of habit. At that point, the words lose their meaning. The only way for him to break the habit is to become aware of it.

And what better way to create awareness than to enforce an apology tax that requires him to pay a set amount every time he apologizes unnecessarily?

The issue here isn’t whether or not I’m setting an apology tax; because that’s happening.

The real question is determining an amount that will have an actual Impactful.

I feel like if I set it too low, it won’t actually be effective because he genuinely enjoys sending to me. But I also don’t want to set it so high that it becomes unreasonable.

It needs to be an amount that will actually make him pause, recognize the habit, and think twice before those words automatically come out.

Open to hear other’s are experiences with similar situation…

So I honestly think that this newer sub of mine thought that he would be my only sub!
He genuinely seemed butt hurt!!

Has anyone else have subs who Expect to be your one and only? And by that I mean the one and only relationship at all??

Click/ Tap the photo!

Before I get started…  YES I used grammarly to correct my spelling and grammar prior to posting this (you’re welcome)! 

AI DOES NOT WRITE MY POST!!

This is how I write!!  My whole purpose of doing these articles/ posts is to provide you with some of the knowledge that i have spent years learning. 

Please keep this in mind before commenting “this is AI” - thanks!! 

“We now resume with our regularly scheduled broadcast….”

In astrology, Black Moon Lilith (BML) is not a planet. It is a point,  the empty focus of the Moon’s elliptical orbit. Metaphysically, it represents:

• What you were taught to be ashamed of
• The part of you that refuses to perform politeness
• The desire that survives every attempt to kill i
• The voice that says “I will not shrink”

Fo r the Findomme archetype, Lilith is not optional. While Pluto gives control and the 8th house gives access to others’ resources, Lilith gives the lack of guilt that makes financial domination clean, sustainable, and psychologically honest.

Without Lilith, Findomme can become performative or self punishing.

With Lilith, it becomes sovereignty.

Part 1: The Core Lilith Signature for Findomme

These are not “nice” placements. They are not meant to be. They indicate a person who has made peace with being unforgivable in the eyes of conventional morality.

1.1 Black Moon Lilith in the 8th House

**The signature: “**Your money is my emotional currency.”

The 8th house rules other people’s resources, debt, inheritance, taboo, psychological contracts, and sexual merging. Lilith here means:

• Arousal and empowerment come from holding financial leverage over another person
• She does not ask for tribute,  she expects it as a natural law
• The shame others feel about money and sex simply does not exist in her
• She can watch someone empty their wallet and feel zero guilt, only clarity

How this shows up in Findomme:

• Subs report feeling “seen in their shame” rather than judged
• She instinctively knows what someone fears losing (money, reputation, access to he
• Tribute feels like relief to the giver, not theft

Shadow if unintegrated: Can slide into genuine exploitation if ethics aren’t conscious. Lilith without consciousness is a wound. Lilith with consciousness is a gift.

1.2 Black Moon Lilith in Scorpio

**The signature: “**I will hold your darkest secret and charge you for the privilege.”

Scorpio is Lilith’s natural home (pre discovery of Pluto). Scorpio BML does not flinch at:

• Death, inheritance, betrayal, obsessive desire, financial ruin, psychological exposure

How this shows up in Findomme:

• She is the dominatrix who knows why you need to send before you do
• Her power is not loud. It is inevitable
• She can sit in silence while a sub confesses their financial limits and still receive tribute because her presence is the transaction

Distinction from 8th house Lilith:

8th house is about the mechanics (money, debt, contracts). Scorpio Lilith is about the psychological flavor (intensity, secrecy, transformation through ruin).

1.3 Lilith Conjunct, Square, or Opposite Pluto

**The signature: “**I am the thing you were told to fear in a woman.”

This is the most dense Lilith aspect for Findomme. Pluto is absolute power. Lilith is unowned shadow. Together:

• She does not manipulate. She reveals what was already true, and the other person collapses into tribute.
• Financial domination is not a kink , it is a spiritual practice of radical honesty
• She has likely been called “too much,” “dangerous,” or “uncontrollable” since childhood

How this shows up in Findomme:

Subs describe her as inevitable, not because she forced them, but because they couldn’t pretend anymore

• She attracts obsessive admirers and bankruptcies without trying
• Her boundaries are absolute because she has no guilt about enforcing them

Shadow warning: This aspect without self‑awareness can become genuinely destructive, to herself or others. Conscious integration is required.

1.4 Lilith Conjunct the Ascendant or in the 1st House

The signature: “I do not seduce. I am the seduction they fear.”

When Lilith sits on the Ascendant or in the 1st house, the body and persona become the vessel of the unowned feminine.

How this shows up in Findomme:

• Men send tribute without being asked. Her face is the advertisement.
• People project their own forbidden desires onto her instantly
• She cannot hide. Even in sweatpants, she looks like a confession.

The practical result for Findomme work:

• Higher conversion rate from look to tribute
• Less need for elaborate marketing or “content strategy”
• More risk of attracting obsessive or boundary‑less subs (requires strong Saturn)

Part 2: Lilith & Money

 The Taurus & Capricorn Placements

Lilith expresses differently through the signs. For Findomme, two signs are particularly potent because they rule money and status directly.

2.1 Lilith in Taurus

**The signature: “**I am what I own and what you give me.”

Taurus rules the 2nd house of personal income, possessions, self worth through resources. Lilith here means:

• Money is not separate from identity. To disrespect her finances is to disrespect her soul.
• She has no shame about wanting luxury, comfort, or financial security
• The shadow feminine expresses through acquisition and entitlement

How this shows up in Findomme:

The “goddess of luxury” archetype, silk, perfume, fine things funded by subs

• Tribute feels like worship not because of psychology but because her life is expensive
• She is less psychologically torturous and more magnetically entitled

Shadow if unintegrated: Can become greedy or materialistic in an unconscious way. Integrated, she teaches subs that beauty and comfort have a price, and that price is sacred.

2.2 Lilith in Capricorn

**The signature: “**Financial hierarchy is my natural habitat.”

Capricorn rules the 10th house of career, public status, authority, and long term structure. Lilith here means:

• She is the boardroom dominatrix. Her power is not sexual theatre , it is structural.
• She finds the unowned feminine in ambition, control, and visible success
• Traditional femininity (soft, nurturing, accommodating) feels like a cage. Financial domination feels like freedom.

How this shows up in Findomme:

• The  CEO Findomme tribute schedules, contracts, performance reviews for subs
• Less kink aesthetic, more corporate dominance
• She attracts subs who are high‑status in public but need to kneel financially in private

Distinction from Taurus Lilith:

Taurus wants your money for her comfort. Capricorn wants your money as proof of hierarchy, that she is above you, and you belong below.

Part 3: Lilith Aspect Venus or Moon 

The Emotional Transaction

Lilith does not act alone. When she touches the personal planets of love (Venus) and emotion (Moon), the Findomme signature becomes deeply wired, not just performed.

3.1 Lilith Square or Opposite Venus

**The signature: “**Love and money are the same conversation.”

Venus rules love, attraction, values, and money. Lilith in hard aspect to Venus means:

• She cannot separate affection from transaction. This is not a choice, it is constitutional.
• Traditional romance feels fake. Tribute feels real
• She has likely been shamed for this (“you’re just using people”) and has had to make peace with it

How this shows up in Findomme:

• She is genuinely affectionate toward subs who pay consistently, not as manipulation but as authentic response
• She does not understand “free attention.” All attention has a cost.
• Vanilla dating feels boring or confusing. Findomme feels like home.

Integrated version: She is clear with subs: “My affection is real, and it is also not free. Both things are true.”

3.2 Lilith Square or Opposite the Moon

**The signature: “**My emotional safety requires you to be financially beneath me.”

The Moon rules emotional needs, comfort, and the inner child. Lilith here means:

• She cannot feel safe in emotional vulnerability. Feeling “needy” is terrifying.
• Financial superiority becomes emotional armor
• She may have learned early that depending on others leads to disappointment or betrayal

How this shows up in Findomme:

• Draining a sub’s wallet soothes her emotionally. It is not cruelty, it is regulation.
• She is not looking for a partner. She is looking for tribute that proves she will never be vulnerable again.
• After a send, she feels calm. Not greedy. Calm.

Shadow warning: Without awareness, this can lead to using Findomme as emotional avoidance rather than conscious practice. With awareness, it becomes healing through honesty, she admits what she needs and takes it cleanly.

The Conscious Integration

• Lilith without consciousness is chaos; shame turned outward, exploitation without ethics, burnout.
• Lilith with consciousness is sovereignty;  clear boundaries, honest transactions, no guilt, no apology.

Ask yourself; does my Findomme practice come from a place of wounding (I must control because I was controlled) or a place of choice (I control because I prefer it)?

Lilith’s gift is that she does not care which one is true. Your gift is that you get to decide what you do with her.

Please keep in mind that Lilith is not evil. She is not broken. She is simply unowned feminine power that refused to die. She is an unapologetically. powerful energy to embrace  

This is an outline from a much more indepth article I had written a while back. If your interested in that article, please let me know!

Also, my DM;s are always open to those interested in learning more!

Seeking a task sub. One who is literate, competent and possibly possess structural and logical organisation skills

Feel free to DM me

This is now the third supposed Domme to slide into my DMs claiming they’ve read my profile, only to follow up with something like, “So I see you like to spoil…” or some other crazy ass statement.

Am I tripping?

I know my profile clearly states that I’m a Findomme. Is it because I recently made a post talking about a few past gifts (which wasn’t even shit)? Or are they just ignorant as hell?

Someone please scan my profile and tell me what WTF I’m missing.