So my boyfriend made me orgasm through clitoral stimulation once. Ever since then, when he or I try stimulating my clitoris, instead of an orgasm, my pelvic floor or vagina starts pulsing and then my clitoris feels to sensitive to continue and doesn’t feel good anymore so I stop or push him away when he tries to keep going. Does anyone know what this is?
This is is as embarrassing as it gets but I legit don't know where else to ask. Probably should use an alt account but don't want to bother with setting one up right now. Basically, every time I'm pleasuring myself I pee... At first I was confused and googled it and google said that may be squirting so then I looked into that and they said its a clear substance with no distinct smell coming from the bladder. But then I noticed mine isn't like that, it is in fact is yellow and isn't odorless. I've even purposefully gone to the bathroom beforehand but it doesn't stop me from peeing. How do I stop peeing every time I try and pleasure myself? Or is this actually just squirting and the internet lied to me about it being pretty. This feels extremely shameful. I know other women have issues with urinary incontinence during intercourse but I'm only using external stimulation so there should be nothing pressing on my bladder causing this. I just want to stop feeling embarrassed of myself in the moment.
27F, I’ve posted in this community before about my various medical woes. Basically, I experienced primary anorgasmia and tried the following interventions:
Addyi, Vyleesi, Viagra cream, pelvic floor physical therapy (twice), pelvic floor muscle injections of steroids and nerve blocks, stopping Zoloft and birth control, hundreds of dollars in different kinds of sex toys, subscription to OMGyes, pelvic floor shockwave treatment, and I was even approved for a sacral neuromodulation implant but insurance denied it.
So, yeah, I’ve tried a lot. During this journey I was also diagnosed with autism, and we came to the conclusion that a lifetime of masking and constant tension has likely damaged my pudendal nerve.
My therapist, and the autism assessor who herself is autistic, mentioned that Buspar (buspirone) could potentially help with the daily overwhelm. I am not an anxious person, but I was struggling at that point so I figured I would try it. I’ve been on Wellbutrin this entire time, which has never helped my libido but seems to take the edge of my depression.
GIRL. I am on 5mg Buspar 2x/day, and I can now have 6+ mini orgasms with relative ease. I’ve never felt any differences in any of the interventions I’ve tried, so this is a pleasant surprise. The sensation seems to build up a lot easier. I think I’ll ask my doc if we can up the dose to see if it might get even better.
I’m hopeful that if I keep “exercising” these mini orgasms, and increase my dose, that hopefully they will build to a point where I get a real sense of mental/physical release I’ve been lacking my entire life :)
Hi all. I’m thinking the next step in my journey is seeking some kind of medical support and I’m not sure where to start. I’m not sure if I should talk to my primary care physician, my gynecologist, or if I should seek out a sex therapist or pelvic floor therapist. I have no idea if any of this will even by covered by insurance or if it will be prohibitively expensive.
To anyone else who went this route, what were your first steps? What doctor(s) did you speak to and what did you tell them? What did the process look like for you and what helped? And if you are in the US, how much of the treatment you tried was covered by your insurance?
So I've only ever been able to orgasm from cowgirl position. I'm guessing it's the clitoral stimulation as it's the grinding back and forth that does it, not the up and down lol hope that makes sense.
Never ever been able to any other way. It wouldn't happen absolutely every time either, but enough.
Currently pregnant with 4th and the orgasms have definitely got less frequent after each child. I definitely haven't had an orgasm since before last child was born (currently 18 months).
I'd guess it was probably 2 years minimum since last orgasm. I don't do toys or masturbate. Never have, never felt the desire or need to. Plus I've always just got bored whenever I've tried masturbating.
Sex is still very much enjoyable and I think I must be too in my head now as I pretty much go into sex know I'm Ng I won't orgasm.
Also never spoke to partner about any of this as worried it would upset him or he'd be offended almost?
Any one been in similar position? I definitely need advice on how to get out of my head - but is there actually something different about my vagina/clitoris after having 3 vaginal births ??
I just want to have orgasms again, I really miss them. 🥲
Hello! I’m Kayla! I’ve recently found out how to actually give myself an orgasm! Not a powerful one, but nonetheless!
Turns out the one thing I’ve been missing for a long time was a suction toy. I’ve been through lots of therapy and heard lots of advice. I’ve read some of the posts on this sub Reddit and noticed I fit in great here!
If it helps anyone, try a suction toy like the rose. It doesn’t do really crazy things for me, but it’s more than I’ve ever been able to feel! I hope this helps someone out there!
Ok so I (32F) am very late to the sex game. I have only started masturbating regularly recently and am not sure if I am reaching climax.
I mostly use a vibrator because I don't get much sensation off of my own fingers. After some external and internal stimulation I am experiencing multiple things: an increase in pleasure sensation to the point where it's almost unbearable, muscles twitching, internal tightening, increased discharge, and an internal "warm" feeling. Typing it out it seems to point to orgasm but I'm not sure for a few reasons:
there isn't any real crescendo at the end of it other then suddenly not really being able to feel anything down there.
my body and mind does not enter a state of relaxation or limpness like my partners have.
I would appreciate any opinions or advice. I'm a little at a loss here.
Hi all, I’ve been lurking on this sub for a while and finally had the courage to post. I am 33F and I have never really masturbated my whole life. I have had sexual partners in the past but no one was really determined to get me off, it was more about their pleasure.
I’m finally dating someone who is determined to make me orgasm lol. He has gone down on me multiple times, and recently when he was at the spot doing it, my whole body went into spasm mode, like I started vibrating rapidly and almost like I couldn’t control my body.
But idk if it felt like I orgasmed. Cause it kinda felt like it happened to an immense pleasure and then just stopped. Idk how else to explain it.
I’m a newbie to all this so please be kind
Thanks
I (20F) have been flicking the bean almost every day since forever. Masturbating is my pride and joy in life— my whole world, even. Over the past few months, however, my world has suddenly become very bleak.
I noticed whenever I started masturbating, orgasming just felt… kinda like peeing? Like if you had to pee really bad but you were too lazy to pause masturbating so you just rode out the orgasm with a full bladder.
At first it was only occassionally, but now I literally can’t orgasm normally. It still feels like an orgasm, albeit weak and instead of pleasurable its just.. piss feeling.
Also, I feel the urge to pee A LOT. I used to pee 3-4 times a day, but now its around 8-9, especially at night. I don’t even have to pee sometimes, but I always feel the urge to. I cant tell if it’s because I’m constantly wanting to masturbate, especially at night, and now I’m starting to associate it with peeing, or if my pussy is broken and I need help.
I recognize that I have somewhat of an addiction to masturbation and have tried to do it less recently. Even though it doesn’t feel good I still have a high libido and want to masturbate. I did it today after stopping for 5 days and there was no difference. I also still had to pee a lot at night.
I have no health problems besides scoliosis. In short orgasming feels like peeing and I also feel like I have to pee a lot now and cant tell if its because I’m desensitized to flicking the bean or theres some underlying bladder problem.
Evening folks, Idk what gender this subreddit is for...but I've a question...what is an orgasm? It's something that's been on my mind for years, as 1. There's not a lot of information online for the female climax... i.e...what it's supposed to feel like, how to achieve one, how to tell you've had one...and since it seems that don't produce fluids like guys with sperm, I'm highly convinced its not real, especially when it says females can't orgasm either...
But my thing is this...after recently coming out of a 2.5 year relationship with a guy (where I don't want to share too much of the bedroom life, let's just say it was very non-existence...a little... uncomfortable...and I didn't feel heard, seen, or whatever, despite numerous amount of civil conversations,) though nevertheless I'm glad I've managed to get out of these days...
Anywho...when I was with him...I've never had one? Or so I don't know...all I remember is this peeing feeling? And I had to stop, and go pee, but it was too hard and sore to pee unless I relaxed my body...(Which itself is hard, relaxation isn't a word in my vocabulary) Could anyone describe what that really means or if I'm on the right track at least?
It's probably my fault for not doing sex myself, and relying on a man to make me climax in the first place...I understand that...but I've never found self stimulation interesting...I'm more about exploring with a man and learning about our bodies for the first time...even though...I've been told that's a disgusting way to even engage in sex. Period.
Idk, I think it's because...of the lack of information really sucks anywhere you look, and I don't know why there isn't more scientific research on the feminine body.
I finally decided to figure out what worked for me, and after a lot of patience, experimentation, and self-discovery, everything changed.
With the right partner, no pressure, and a better understanding of my body, I eventually experienced my first orgasm during sex. It took years, but it was absolutely worth the journey.
So last night my boyfriend of 2 years made me squirt for the first time using a vibrator on me… and I will say it was amazing, I came a little before I squirted. I’m just curious that was the first time I’ve ever squirted and I want to be able to do it more often or easier if that makes sense and I was wondering what advice yall have
I don’t necessarily know if my question is the result I want but I’m just curious. My general disposition is that my brain is running 110% of the time unless I’m doing things that don’t require much thought at all.
I’m the kind of person who can’t shut their brain off and really can only enjoy something unless I don’t have to use critical thinking skills or have to make a decision entirely. I love planning out details for life in general but if I have to make decisions in the moment it can pretty much kill my mood in any capacity.
I guess my main question/thing is wondering how I don’t make myself assume that every touch or intimate gesture will lead to sex. My boyfriend and I kiss/cuddle/compliment each other but my brain automatically assumes that things will lead to intimacy and that kind of puts some pressure on me that also kills any potential for orgasm since I subtlety go into a mindset of how things will work to make sure that my partner enjoys sex.
First, grateful that I found this reddit. On this journey of self-exploration, I had my first vaginal orgasm couple of weeks ago. More blended but mostly vaginal, if that makes sense. At the time, I used something similar to a lipstick vibrator but longer and larger. I don't like the sensation of vibrations so, that was off.
I have been fortunate to have partners who were above average in size. Never had a PIV orgasm. I can say I enjoy the thrusts, when I'm into it, but nothing has ever gotten me there. I have fuller labia so the contact with my clitoris is minimal during penetration and I'm a slow burn. Prior to the discovery with the toy and clitoral stimulation, I never let my fingers do the walking during penetration. I was comfortable doing this during foreplay but something about the penis' position made it feel different, like I can't get to that spot that I need to and that it's stretched/numbed.
I always felt that I penetration makes me feel "full" and stretched out, no pain whatsoever and not unenjoyable...just full.
So after my recent discovery, I invested in a 7 inch dildo to find out more about this sensation. Here's what happens... same sensation of fullness even after arousal and lots of lube amd taking my time. Stuck with it and incorporated finger play all through. I can tell when the lengthening and tenting (just learnt that that's what it's called) etc happens and I'm about to climax but I know what usually happens next is I clench and then the vaginal contractions begin and always pushes my finger/toy out.
With the new toy, I felt like the fullness was a hindrance especially since from what I could gather, I couldn't contract the way I'm used to. All orgasms are great but I kept edging and I wasn't able to have one as powerful as I had with the "smaller" toy and I could tell that the contractions were sort of interrupted by the fullness. I also struggled to keep it in. It was definitely a clitoral orgasm and not blended.
I feel like having a partner with a larger size was always sold to as the ideal l but now I'm like, is it really? I would like to enjoy my partner regardless of size but I'm now more open.
Regarding the fullness, has anyone had a similar experience and how did they figure it out?
My boyfriend and I were fondling and teasing each other before we went to sleep. We did that a couple of times before actually going to sleep.
My boyfriend was half asleep and started touching me and kissing my back(something he does when we make out/touch each other before bed).
We did that for sometime, both half asleep kissing slowly and touching each other. Holding each other tightly. Which eventually led to PIV sex, but this time it felt different. I don’t know if it was because I wasn't in my head, all the teasing and slow build up, the fact that I was half asleep or the angel. But it felt different. I normally make a lot of noise when we have PIV sex, but this time I was breathing deep.
We were going at it for a while, when I started to feel this warmth in my stomach. I started to shake and started making my orgasm sounds. (I have a very specific sound I make when orgasming from him using toys on me). He pulled out and i could tell I was contracting and spasming.
This caught me by surprise because this hasn’t happened before and it wasn’t as intense as my regular orgasms with vib/fingers or as noticeable. Because not too long ago I came with him for sure while I was shallowing his dick and holding one of my vibrators on my clit and that was my most noticeable and most obvious orgasm i have had with him while using one of my vibrators during sex. I asked him if it felt any different as well and he told me, he could feel me squeezing his dick tighter than I had before and that's what made him need to pull out.
So I am wondering did I orgasm and because that was the first time with no toys it wasn’t as strong or was I on the clasp of orgasming but didn’t get there fully. Does anyone have any takes or experiences?
TLDR
My boyfriend and I were making out/touching each other before bed. We woke up later and started kissing and touching which led to PIV sex. But it felt different this time. I felt a warm feeling and had contractions after, but it wasn’t as noticeable as my regular orgasms, but I made the same sounds. Was I close to orgasming or did I orgasm and it wasn’t super noticeable because it was the first time with no toys and it was a new experience?
Hey girls,
I’m 28F and in my first intimate relationship. My boyfriend and I have great chemistry and sex feels good, but I don’t orgasm with him, even with foreplay, oral, fingering, or penetration.
I can orgasm on my own, but only through external stimulation (usually with a vibrator) outside the vagina. Penetration feels good, but it doesn’t get me there.
Is this normal? Has anyone experienced the same thing, and did anything help?
Became an adult recently. conservative country, our sex ed is basically rounded up to "don't have sex, and if you do, use protection"
I can't get toys. Can't get lube. ( i tried hand cream once, did not feel nice. i don't think i like the texture of lubricants in general. ) Sometimes I feel what I assume is arousal and then there's discharge? On the inside? of my vagina? White-ish sticky stuff, or slippery stuff. I don't understand what it is.
And sometimes there's this aching feeling where I feel like my insides are pulsing in a rhythm and I want to fill it with something. Feels a lot like being urgent to pee but without the peeing part.
Feel the need almost daily. If I try to put fingers inside it's too big and just hurts. ( also I am scared to put anything in ) Resorted to rubbing the outside areas ( the big puffy part where hair somewhat grows) or rubbing clit but rubbing the clit only feels good if it's wet.
Is this normal?
Also, unsure of where people normally orgasm. If liquid comes out it seems very messy. I don't want to make a mess.
I know people with penises can probably aim it into the toilet. Is this possible to do with a vagina? I would do it in the shower but I am scared because I have weak legs. I don't want to fall. I find it hard to control body when I am trying to get the pleasure to grow. Or is there a way to stop pleasure quickly like when I am in public and I suddenly feel the ache?? thanks. sorry if i am asking too many questions
Hi everyone. Despite being 21 I'm quite new to anything sexual. Recently I bought a bullet vibrator because I wasn't going anywhere with my fingers, and although it was helped immensely, I can't seem to climax. I manage to get to what I assume is the tipping point; my whole body contracts, my walls start to spasm and I feel this huge need of release, yet I can't seem to obtain it. I stay with that need and then I lose it, which is very frustrating.
I don't know if I might actually be orgasming without realising it. I understand everyone's orgasms are different, but I genuinely belive I am not reaching it because I don't feel anything after my body stops contracting, is more of a feeling of losing the sensation rather than climaxing. Sorry if this doesn't make sense, I don't know how else to word it 😅.
The thing is, I have been reading a lot in this subreddit and I was wondering if edging would help. I reach the point of convulsion rather quickly, so maybe there's a disconect in my body that prevents me from orgasming and i need more time???
I don't know, but I would appreciate it if anyone could give me tips on how to properly edge myself (do I take breaks, when to stop, etc) and if anyone has gone through this, what's your experience? Did you manage to overcome it?
Thank you in advance!
I've tried using my own fingers but it just doesn't work, I feel like I get even more anxiety because my bf can't make me finish also and it makes him feel bad and then I feel more bad and yeah…
me and my partner (both female) have been together for 7 months. we ve had some issues with sex at the beginning, both being super conscious bout our bodies and so on, we ve overcome that phase. the problem is that i cant cum, i dont wanna necessarily cum but it gets to a point where i get really frustrated and the same thing happens to her. the problem is that im really turned on, i get wet and when she starts fucking me after a really short time, like not even 10 mintues, im not wet anymore. the only time i can stay wet is when i fuck her, we tried once to fuck each other at the same time and it worked for me but i still couldnt cum and it wasnt comfortable enough for both of us. we ve tried a lot of things. she ate me out, did the combo, fingered me, used the strap on, used a vibrator, tried different positions, nothing works. we also both want to feel things at the same time. what can we do?
this is not my first relationship. ive had another girlfriend roughly two years or so ago that lasted 1.2 years. the communication wasnt it, we were both really young (18 &19, now im 21 and my girlfriend is 20), anyway i didnt feel shit back then either but i didnt speak about it, i just faked it and hoped that one day i ll be able to feel smth but i didnt. this time is different, we talk about everything and we re really open with each other and thats why its so frustrating. cuz she s able to cum but she has to use her vibrator cuz otherwise she cant feel shit or she had to be really turned on to feel smth and i cant feel shit from that vibrator, and i can only cum when i do it myself. ive started to question if i ever came.